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Woman’s Voice: In your wickedness, you have broken the ancient commandments and crafted a bond with one of the light. Our laws are clean. They demand you be eternally imprisoned. As for the impure child, she must be kept from the path of the dark arts forever.
Man’s Voice: Rise my Child! Rise to realize your true potential! Unleash your power and awaken the Eyes of the World!
BAYONETTA
IN A UNIVERSE OF LIGHT AND DARK, WHERE PERCEPTION IS REALITY...
[Two witches fight a horde of angels on a piece of clock tower flying down at tremendous speed.]
Narrator: Long since erased from the records of time, there once existed two European Clans who served as overseas of history for the powers that be: The Umbra Witches, dwellers of the darkness, and the Lumen Sages, controllers of light. The clans paid each other great respect, and their efforts to maintain the balance between them defended the just passage of time. Yet, one day, that balance was toppled. The once harmonious clans fell into disagreement and stoked the flames of hatred against each other, resulting in an era of strife. The conflict between the Umbra and the Lumen threw all of Europe into a chaotic loop of battle, ambush, assassination; and casualty. It was truly a gruesome war. Despite the tremendous radiance of God shining upon them, the Lumen Sages were gradually weakened by the assault of the secretive dark witches. Years after the balance was lost, the war had ended in the Umbra Witches' favor. Their victory was short-lived. Fearing the witches’ dark abilities, humans began to condemn the remaining Umbra. They launched the witch hunts, rounding up the battle-weary witches with little resistance and subjugating those who wished to continue the struggle. Human faith in the miracles of their God pushed the witch hunts further, and soon the Umbra Witches, keepers of the darkness, were extinguished from the Earth. All but one.
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
Jeanne: I'm OK!
Bayonetta: Let's go! Just stay close to me!
PRESENT DAY
[The scene changes to a plane, where a group of fanatics is reciting some kind of prayer and then stabbing themselves with daggers. One of the witches, Jeanne, is watching from the shadows.]
Enzo: It looks like Humpty Dumpty's taken his last fall. Even old Eggman the Destroyer gets scrambled in the end, right? You know, I still don't get why the hell you drag me out here for these things. I just drop off the merchandise. Hey, bet you can't guess what today is? Readin' the good lord's book ain't gonna do much. People been waiting for this asshole to get whacked for ages. Hell, look around. There‘s no love lost for old Humpty Dumpty. But you gotta keep the outfit happy. We don't take care of him, they take care of us. and I prefer my shoes made out of rubber, not concrete. But hey, it's that kinda town. Without good hearted souls like us to put these bastards six feet under, where'd society be? Course, the pay‘s not bad either. Jesus, you really get into this shit, dontcha? If it were me, I’d be praying he ends up barbecue... Or at least Sunny side up! You can keep praying, but the only way this guy‘s meeting the Lord is if God's hungry for breakfast! Speaking of hungry, we done here? My kids are baking me a birthday cake tonight. Cute little fuckers, I tell ya what... Well then, adios!
[He throws his cigar over the coffin. Suddenly the cemetery is illuminated by a bright light, coming as if from heaven.]
Enzo: What the fuck? They're here!? For this douchebag!? I hate this damn light! I can't see a thing! But they're there... Ain't they!? You hearin' me!? You can see them, can't you!?
Nun: I see them. They are instruments of God, descending upon his heavenly rays to Earth. Dear Lord, guidance and keep safe for the souls of our loved ones for all eternity.
Enzo: Oh… My… God...
Nun?: You look tired. Let me tuck you in.
Enzo: Oh shit! C'mon! It's my frickin’ birthday! Mother of Mary! I didn't mean all that Humpty Dumpty shit, I swear!
Rodin: Next time you wanna lay hands on me, you better make sure I'm dead. Now move out the way. Go!!!
Enzo: Ro-Ro-Rodin?!
Rodin: If it ain't my good buddy, Enzo. How bout you get outta here? You die, and I'm gonna have to go back in that hole chasin' after the money you owe me.
Nun?: Do you naughty little angels deserve a good spanking?
Rodin: Beautiful. Bayonetta!
Bayonetta: Now this is cheeky, throwing me these cheap toys!
Rodin: Don't worry about quality. I've got quantity!
Bayonetta: Guns! Guns! Guns! Guns!
Rodin: If you just gonna watch, I’m putting you two to work! That was your last call. No more guns from me, Bayonetta!
Bayonetta: As long as there’s music, I’ll keep on dancing.
(GAMEPLAY)
Enzo: I'm not dead yet! You can't take me like this! It's against regulations. I tell ya! Ahhhh!! Damn it! Who did that!? I just bought the damn thing!
Bayonetta: Haven't you figured it out yet!? There's no quarter for you in this world!
[]
Bayonetta: Rodin should be paying me for even touching these toys.
Enzo: You have any idea how much this is going to cost to fix!? How the fuck do I always get wrapped up in this shit!?
Bayonetta: Engine still purrs nicely. Now, about this little thing you've been looking into for me, Enzo. Let's have a quick chat...
Enzo: See!? This is why I told you I was going home! I just got held up in the air by some invisible... things... and you want an intelligence briefing!? It never stops with you.
Rodin: You keep bellyachin' like that and you're liable to wake Eggman from the dead. And I don't think either of you would like that. Catch you later, Bayonetta. Something tells me you're going to need a rush on our special project. Before the shit hits the fan.
Enzo: Wait! Rodin! What about Eggman!?
Bayonetta: Such a popular chap. I bet they hate him down there as much as you did when he was up here. We just need to make sure he won't come crawling back when they kick him out.
Rodin: Nothing a flower bed can't fix. Fill 'er up.
Bayonetta: You heard the man. Finish up in 5 minutes or you're walking home to your cake and candles.
Enzo: What!? Don't you leave me here! What a day! I'm screwed! Its gonna take every cent I earned on this charade; to pay for the damage... I tell you what, if l could see them bastards that did this to my car, fuggetaboutit!
Bayonetta: Enzo. The road? Pay attention, dear.
Enzo: How can you be so calm!? You're still getting screwed in all this, too! Of all the lowlife scum in too deep in this town, I've never seen one get wrapped up in a fight with god's messengers. Dressed like a nun, too. When you end up in the afterlife, that's not going to be pretty!
Bayonetta: I can't help it if I like the little outfits. The toys are nice, too.
Enzo: 20 years ago, you woke up stuck in a casket at the bottom of a lake. All you can remember is that you're a witch. But now you're stuck, because you've gotta sacrifice our halo-wearing friends everyday or they'll drag your ass back down to hell. I know I thought I got screwed, but bein' forced to slap around the divine for a livin'? That's really getting screwed!
Bayonetta: If I needed a biographer, you wouldn't be my first choice. I see to the funeral, you get me the information I asked for. That was our deal.
Enzo: Come on now! Look at my poor car! I'm working for free after this. At least let me get a drink at Rodin’s before you start drilling me. The info I got is good. It's gonna get you close to finding the other stone in the pair, and figuring out some of that lost past of yours. I swear. After jewels instead of cash! Just like a girl! Jesus! Can't you take a joke!?
Bayonetta: Enzo... Someone's given you a present. Too bad I can't stand bugs.
Enzo: Huh? What the fuck!?
Bayonetta: You!?
Jeanne: What’s the matter, Bayonetta? All that sleeping made you soft?
(GAMEPLAY)
Bayonetta: That girl…
Rodin: Those assholes sure know how to get attention. Even perked the ears of the hot heads down home.
Bayonetta: You don't say.
Rodin: It's getting harder and harder to tell the worlds apart. Human world. Inferno. Paradiso. Who can tell the difference?
Bayonetta: Even harder with Purgatorio in the middle. Fight long enough in there and you'll really lose sight. Why the sudden interest in metaphysics?
Rodin: It's a balance, right? Even if some of them like messin' around with the humans, we‘ve all got a stake in the status quo. But people keep fuckin' around like this, the Book of Revelations is gonna look like mother goose. Heaven and Hell are gonna go straight for each other's throats.
Bayonetta: Heaven and Hell can tear each other to pieces for all I care. I've got my own problems to worry about.
Rodin: Something's up. Everything was a bit too brazen, and Enzo's tip makes the timing too perfect. This reeks of a set up. Someone in one of those lost memories calling you out. I got a little present for you. These babies are special. Built from an alloy the devil himself would kill to get his hands on. Don't break these, cuz they're one-of-a-kind.
Bayonetta: Calling me out? I don't go in for strange offers. Then again, I'm getting a little tired of these weaklings they keep throwing at me. Maybe I should aim for something a bit more... High class.
Rodin: Pounding them down tonight, baby. Not to butt into your affairs, but I'm pretty sure you got somewhere better to be. The guys you're up against aren't the I m type to wait for you to finish a round. Enzo! Her drinks are goin' on your tab, buddy! Ya deadbeat motherfucker.
(Bayonetta abruptly wakes up in train like from a nightmare. She dreamed of the girl she saw.)
Train Announcer: Welcome to Vigrid, your final stop. Entry Visas are required of all travelers. Please submit your Vigrid issued Entry Visa for inspection upon disembarking. Please make sure you take all your valuable belongings with you. Repeating this message...
Man’s Voice: You have arrived at last, my dear. The time has come to awaken The Eyes of the World. Fear not, my dear child. Such a beautiful young lady you've become. I'll always see to it no harm comes to you.
Bayonetta: (leaving the train) So… This is supposed to be paradise?
(Some time later she meet Rodin again.)
Rodin: I knew it. This town's teeming with heaven's little helpers. It's making my buddies downstairs awfully nervous.
Bayonetta: And your point is?
Rodin: Some places in this world are closer to Paradiso or Inferno. The rathole of a town you and I live in is close to both, but the Vigridians got this special air about 'em. They're Closer to Paradiso than anyone should ever be. And that shit just plain creeps me out. Heh, I guess I‘m gonna have to set up shop here and score me some halos. These stupid rings are worth a fortune back home. Since it seems you‘re spoiling for a fight, if you come across any of these, bring 'em to me and I'll hook you up. Another one looking to line his pockets. Huh. I'm beginning to see why Enzo is so fond of you.
Rodin: Real cute. But let's get one thing straight, your fights are yours alone. I'm only here to watch my handiwork in action. So don't get any bright ideas about coming to me for help.
Bayonetta: No, you get one thing straight. I'm not the slightest bit interested in the fact that you made these guns. If you get in my way, I will, how do the Americans put it? Oh yes. Bust a cap in yo’ ass.
Rodin: Right on, baby! Right on!
(From now on Bayonetta can buy weapons and items from Rodin. She go to his shop.)
Rodin: You’re here for business or pleasure? Either way, I'll hook you up.
(Bayonetta enters the portal and goes back in time. Two witches approach her.)
Witch: What are you doing!? Let’s go!
(They fight with a huge angel head. After some time, the head flies away, and the bayonet returns to its time. She enters the Gates of Hell.)
Rodin: Well, well... An Angelic Hymns Gold LP... Got your hands on something awfully rare, haven't ya? That thing is the perfect bait to coax out some a of hell's uglies. One note hits their ears, and a damn who's who of Inferno comes pouring out of the inner circles. Then I can use them to breath life into what I make best... weapons of mass destruction. Tell ya what. You give me that record, and I'll order up something so fiendish. angels will cry at the sight of it. I'll just have to pop down to the tropics for a bit, so take a load off.
(He enters the portal and returns barely alive.)
Rodin: All done. He's a little rude, but he makes up for it with charm. Be nice to him. OK?
(Bayonetta has a new weapon her its disposal Onyx Roses. These are two girly shotguns.)
Bayonetta: Fancy bumping into you here.
Jeanne: Out to find some answers about your past, are we?
Bayonetta: You've quite the familiar face. And using the same powers. But you'll have to forgive me, do we knew each other?
Jeanne: Same powers!? Don't make me laugh. I Your little dip in that lake has left you a bit rusty.
Bayonetta: I've been high and dry for 20 years now. The only rust on me is from the lack of any real challenge. Perhaps you're up for the task.
Jeanne: You‘ve already disappointed me.
(She steals Bayonetta’s necklace. Bayonetta is trying to take it away but without success.)
Jeanne: This is a moment I have long desired. But you've forgotten your destiny and wasted the past 20 years.
(She throws the necklace to Bayonetta.)
Bayonetta: You're right, I do seem to be having trouble remembering things of late. Would you be so kind as to take it from the top?
Jeanne: (adjusting makeup) Two overseers... The Eyes of the World. They are the power behind everything.
(Bayonetta recalls the past.)
Woman: Jeanne, as heir to the clan, the time has come for you to prove your right to fight under the Umbran name. You may select opponent of your choose.
Jeanne: Then allow me to face the outcast.
(She throws a dagger into the cage where we see Bayonetta.)
Woman: No! It is forbidden! The child is of impure blood. Challenging her would be a violation of our tenets of faith!
Jeanne: It would not be the first time we have faced each other.
Woman: What!?
Jeanne: (to Bayonetta) Will you face me in this hallowed arena?
Bayonetta: Well if I must, but I pray you've got a little something for me in return. You know. I‘m very fond of stuffed animals.
(They fight. Bayonetta wins and returns to her time. Now she has the ability to run on the walls.)
Bayonetta: Jeanne....
(Bayonetta goes to town. There we see a man fleeing from the soldiers. Seeing a beautiful woman, the man stops.)
Idiot: Fate brought us here together and it will never tear us apart.
Stupid Solder: Damn it!! I said stop! I'm authorized to use deadly force! Fuck! Where'd that bugger go!?
(The idiot manages to jump onto the balcony of one of the buildings and escape from the stupid soldier.)
Idiot: Sayonara! Fleur de Cirey, Eau du Parfum. Such a wonderful floral bouquet, with its subtle hints of Rosemary. You know, in the language of flowers, Rosemary equates to remembrance. Which doesn't quite equate to you, now does it, Bayonetta. Shit! Will you stop that!?
Bayonetta: That little bug on Enzo was a nice touch. Seeing you here, I suppose it wasn't the only one. You've certainly bloomed, haven't you my little Cheshire puss?
Idiot: I'm not your pet. The name is Luka. A name you better remember. Shit! Damn it! Wait! You can't just run away from me like that! I know what I saw that day!
(Flashback. We see a scuba diver opening the coffin of Bayonetta. Breaking free, she strangles the diver.)
Young Luka: FATHER!!
Luka: I know all about your kind. Sure, my colleagues laugh at me for chasing fairy tales, amongst other things, but I know they are real! I know the truth! This smell... It's the same smell that clung to the air the day my father was murdered. Which means I'm right on your doorstep, Bayonetta!
Bayonetta: I'll let you in on a little secret, Cheshire.
Luka: The name is Luka.
Bayonetta: You need to hone your sense of smell, my dear. There is no rosemary in the perfume. After all rosemary's a demon repellent.
(She kills all the angels.)
Luka: You only run away so fast because you've got something to run from... Me! But you can't escape me forever!
(Bayonetta visits The Gates of Hell.)
Rodin: Another LP? Heh... Workin me to the bone... But no need to ity me, I was bored anyways. Let me go whip some things into shape for ya. (he goes to hell and back) This took a bit to pound into shape, but the workmanship's solid. Now go put this thing to good use!
(He give Bayonetta a sword called [[w:c:bayonetta:修羅刃_-Shuraba-|修羅刃 -Shuraba-]] (The Sword of [[wikipedia:Asura_(Buddhism)|Asura]]))
(She visit some church in Vigrid.)
Bayonetta: Who's there? You've late enough hide and seek my scurrying little friend. Just a child? What are you doing running around Vigrid? You're certainly not dressed in your Sunday best.
(Bayonetta sees the girl's face and overwhelming by memories. She remembers sitting in a cage. When she comes to herself the girl are no longer there and a huge invisible monster bursts into the church.)
Angel Monster: The Eyes of the World... The two overseers... What once was held in the hands of the witch clan shall now be held in ours!
(Bayonetta defeats the monster.)
Bayonetta: If I was your child, I'd be an awfully ugly witch, wouldn't I? Yours is a face only a mother could love, and one I could never forget. If only I could remember where from...
Angel Monster: Well then. My apologies. If you are not my awakener, than you and I have no quarrel.
(Bayonetta hits the monster with a stone.)
Bayonetta: No quarrel? You're in no position to decide that. See, my Infernal partners love my ability to eliminate your kind. I figured your sacrifice would shut them up for a while.
(Everything starts to crumble. Bayonetta escapes.)
(Bayonetta visits The Gates of Hell.)
Rodin: No matter how much you ask, I'm not puttin' a chainsaw on your arm. So what do you want?
(Bayonetta get that she needs and leave.)
Bayonetta: You again? And here I thought I'd see the last of you.
Angel Monster: It is most kind of you to alleviate my need to search you out, Bayonetta. Please forgive me my prior trespass lack of hospitality.
(We learn the name of the monster - Fortitudo.)
Bayonetta: I'm sure you will be more than hospitable to me this time around.
Fortitudo: I have been informed that a survivor of the witch hunts is resisting our domination. However, her inevitable reunion with hell makes her such a sad soul. If you are this pitiful being, then shall I release you from your torment.
(Bayonetta shoots him.)
Bayonetta: I'm sorry. I forgot to mention one of the reasons I hunt your kind. You are much too ugly not put out of your misery.
Fortitudo: Challenging us with the dark arts!? No matter the age, witches never learn...
(Bayonetta shoots him again.)
Bayonetta: Flock off, feather-face!
(Bayonetta defeats Fortitudo.)
Bayonetta: You know you're not nearly so ugly when you're screaming.
Fortitudo: It was as foretold... Your power... Incredible...
Bayonetta: Foretold!? Explain yourself!
Fortitudo: I, Fortitudo, am but a simple sacrifice for the resurrection of the Creator. May the Creator, Jubileus, grace you on your journey.
(He dies.)
Man's Voice: My dear, sweet child... Fear not, for I am watching over you... Continue on your path.
Bayonetta: Where the hell am I? I better have got frequent flyer miles for that flight.
[After some time, she notices a small oblong object on the ground.]
Bayonetta: Huh? My lipstick.
[He bends down to pick up her lipstick, and at that moment Luka tries to take a picture of her from the other world.]
Luka: Nothing! Damn...
[Stopping time, Bayonetta hums and draws him a cat whisker with her lipstick.]
Luka: What the--?
Bayonetta: I've often seen a girl without lipstick, but lipstick without a girl!? Most curious, isn't it Cheshire? What's also most curious is how a child like you has kept afloat in this town.
Luka: The… name… is… Luka! And don't you think it's a little strange to be worried about my well being? Sure, the festival of resurrection has peaked security. The thing only happens once every 500 years, can you blame them? Besides, when you look as good as I do, security isn't a problem. But a killer like you on the other hand… I'm sure you've found a way.
Bayonetta: (thinking) That little girl... I've seen her somewhere…
[She hears a voice coming from the depths of her consciousness...]
Voice: My dear, sweet child… She is the key to your future. To save yourself, you must also save the girl.
Luka: Hey, don't go freaking out on me. We both know you came here for something. But what you don't know is the closer you get, the harder it's gonna be for you to get away from me and what you've done. You'll have to fess up to it all! Ahh... I can't wait for you to get your hands on whatever it is you're after.
Bayonetta: Let me guess, you want a cut? Well, If you’re still alive by then, perhaps you can appeal to my generosity?
Luka: Still alive? You may be standing right in front of me, but you're definitely not living in reality. Which is a shame, because the truth is always going to be the truth. All I see when I look at you, the real you, is the truth. The truth is you killed my father. I don't care who believes me, they can't reject the truth. The truth will set me free from your black stain on my life. The truth will allow me to expose you to the world. Then I'll have won. And I'll do it without stooping to your level, because I'm not a heartless witch like you.
[Bayonetta adjusts her glasses and goes straight to Luka.]
Luka: Who, what are you going to do!? Kill me in plain sight? Go ahead. It would only prove everything I've said about you. Well, that, and sadden the hearts of a number of young ladies. Claire, and Trish, and Silvie, and Ammy… Oh, you don't want to piss her off let me tell you. Hell hath no fury!
[Bayonetta suddenly jumps onto Luka, hugging him in flight and landing on top of him when they land.]
Luka: What the...!?
[Part of the location collapses - Bayonetta saves Luka, after which she abruptly and mysteriously disappears.]
[Bayonetta climbs to the top of a tall building. A real storm is raging all around, and a powerful wind is blowing, knocking her off her feet. He notices a witch in red talking to Temperantia, one of the four Auditio of the Hierarchy of Laguna.]
Temperantia: What is the meaning of this? This is now not once, but twice. Explain this meddling in our affairs!
Jeanne: The only ones meddling are your hapless minions. This will be taken care of in the manner I see fit. Your assistance is not required.
[She notices Bayonetta.]
Jeanne: I suppose coming here has given you a second wind. Feeling better, Bayonetta?
Bayonetta: Who are you? And don't you dare say my long lost sister.
Jeanne: Sister!? You've quite the active imagination. You and I once fought for the jewels upon the crown of the Umbra throne. And now that you've returned, my sleeping beauty, it is time to finish that fight.
[Bayonetta remembers how Jeanne stabbed her a long time ago.]
Jeanne: No time for daydreaming.
[They start an epic battle, showing the highest mastery of their pistols, non-human dexterity and reaction speed. Their fight is interrupted by an earthquake. Bayonetta uses it to retreat.]
Jeanne: Those cretins fouled it all up again! But perhaps this can be to my advantage.
[She catches up with Bayonetta and continues fighting her, but loses.]
Jeanne: What's the matter, sweetie? Afraid of something, are you!?
Bayonetta: Afraid? Me?
Jeanne: This is a waste of my time. You're still not ready.
[She transforms into a red panther and quickly runs away, and then transforms into a bird and flies away. Surprised by such abilities, Bayonetta decides to try to repeat such a trick, and she succeeds.]
Bayonetta: Oh my... That was bloody amazing.
[She makes a powerful leap in panther form and flies over the full moon.]
[Bayonetta arrives at Proving Ground Ruins. After a long battle, she arrives at the massive castle and kicks down the door. Several angels are doing something at the opposite door…]
Bayonetta: What are you boys doing in here? Are you hiding something from me? Come on…
[She turns her ass toward them as if beckoning them toward her, then shoots them with her pistols. She mocks the last survivor.]
Bayonetta: You've been cheating on me, haven't you? Someone else caught you eye?
[She beats him with the handle of her gun and throws him against the wall, throwing feathers everywhere. Afterwards, Bayonetta notices a crying girl who is in another world, making her look like a ghost.]
Bayonetta: Oh, dear. Something tells me I'm going to regret this.
[Bayonetta hears the voice again.]
Voice: My sweet, lovely child… She is the key to your future.
[Angels appear all around the girl. Bayonetta grabs the child and moves her into her world, covering her with a protective field.]
Bayonetta: I'm not normally one to play saviour, but I suppose I could make an exception and kill all you. Just this once, of course.
[Bayonetta keeps her promise and kills everyone. Afterward, she hears her own voice, melodiously singing "Fly to the Moon," as if from a thick fog. She wakes up lying on the floor.]
Girl: Mummy!
Bayonetta: Was I just singing?
Girl: Mummy!
Bayonetta: Whoa! Slow down, little one. I am not your mother.
Girl: But... Mummy!
Bayonetta: Will you quit calling me "Mummy"!
[The girl begins to cry. Bayonetta sighs and picks up the girl, pulling out her gun. She turns it over and raises the girl's chin with the handle.]
Bayonetta: If there's two things I hate in this world it's cockroaches and crying babies. Well, a crying baby cockroach would be truly terrible… So don't you dare cry.
Girl: Yes, Mummy.
Bayonetta: You've got to be a strong little one to survive in a place like this. What's your name, anyway?
Girl: Cereza.
Bayonetta: Cereza? You're not from Vigrid, are you little one? Where are you from?
Cereza: I'm from my house.
Bayonetta: Well now, I'll hazard a guess this isn't your home, so what on earth are you doing here?
Cereza: My Daddy told me to come here.
Bayonetta: And whereabouts is this “Daddy” of yours?
Cereza: He was at work, but now I don't know where he's gone. I want to go home!
[She grabs Bayonetta's leg.]
Bayonetta: I can't just drag you along wherever I go, little one. So you better not be getting attached to me.
Cereza: Yes, Mummy.
Bayonetta: (sighs) Come now little one. I'll help you out of here, but that's all.
[Cereza grabs Bayonetta by the long red strip of cloth sticking out of her hair.]
Bayonetta: And you have to promise there will be no crying. A single tear and you'll be crying alone. Got it?
Cereza: Okay, Mummy.
[Bayonetta sighs. Cereza cheerfully follows her. They enter the ruins of Vigrid, where Bayonetta has a chance to fight the giant angel, protecting Cereza at the same time. They enter a portal and travel to Paradiso. Cereza merrily runs away, but Bayonetta grabs her and lifts her into the air.]
Bayonetta: This is probably how you got lost to begin with.
[Suddenly the portal is blocked and several angels appear in front of Bayonetta.]
Cereza: Mummy…
Bayonetta: Don't worry, it's always scary the first time you see them. (to angels) So where was I? Oh yes. Your kind invitation. I do hope you've prepared desert as well.
[It kills them very quickly. Several angels in heavy armor and with shields appear.]
Bayonetta: Oh what a lovely tea party! And dancing, too! Cereza, my dear, watch and learn!
[After protecting Cereza with a force field, Bayonetta enters the battle, after which she goes to fight a huge angel blocking the passage with its mass. The battle, however, does not go according to plan. The angel grabs Cereza.]
Bayonetta: Little one!
Cereza: Mummy!
[Bayonetta fights the angel, after which her demonic costume turns into a dragon and devours him. Bayonetta catches Cereza falling from the angel's mouth. After Bayonetta notices... herself at the other end of the corridor. She is the one who caught Cereza while the real Bayonetta was fighting. Bayonetta runs to her through the laser barricades and, catching up to her, winks at Cereza, who immediately realizes that she is not in the hands of the real Bayonetta. She bites her hand and runs to the portal. The real Bayonetta stares at her reflection for a while, then falls into the fray. It turns out to be a shape-shifting angel. Having won, Bayonetta follows Cereza. She spots her and Luka on the bridge.]
Cereza: Mummy!
Luka: Mummy!? You're a mom? You!?
Bayonetta: Come now, Cheshire. Look at me. Do I look like I have any interest in children? Now making them. Well, that’s another story.
Luka: Whoa! Whoa! You're getting the wrong idea. I mean, it might be the right idea. But not right now right, right? Yeah... Uh... Speaking of right, I'm glad I've been standing around waiting for you, because I knew we’d cross paths. See, the only way to reach the upper crust and their gated island of champagne wishes and caviar dreams is over Prominence Bridge.
Bayonetta: Oh... Yes... The island… Lovely place, isn't it? Oh, now what!?
Luka: Don't play games with me! You've worked your magic on this poor defenseless child, haven't you!? You’re a sad, sick woman, you know that? I was her age when you killed my father. Wait... No... You couldn't… Oh my god, you did, didn't you? You killed her parents!
Bayonetta: Hmm... Come to think of it, she's better off with you. You two are more hassle than you're worth.
Luka: What!?
Bayonetta: Just keep a good eye on her, or you're gonna catch hell for it. No good deed goes unpunished, and you never know when a monster may sneak up on you.
[Ironically, several angels sneak up on her.]
Ceraza: Mummy! Look out!
[The angels attack and Bayonetta moves with them to another world.]
Luka: How in the--
[The bridge collapses and Luka uses a hook to leave it with Careza.]
Cereza: Mummy! No!
[Bayonetta looks after them from another world.]
Bayonetta: How can she see me!?
[She goes out to the military base. There are several hangars for planes and other equipment. A real hurricane is blowing through the air, lifting cars into the air. Bayonetta doesn't even pretend to dodge it all. She go straight to the eye of the storm.]
Temperantia: (translated) Ahh, the lovely Bayonetta. Such beautiful eyes… Despite the passing of time, you still hold the pride of an overseer don’t you?
Bayonetta: I feel like a fucking celebrity in this town!
[A bus falls on her, which makes Temperantia laugh. However... we see Bayonetta floating on a piece of rock, spinning around the high angel.]
Bayonetta: See that!? Everyone rushes at me like crazed fans. They still haven't figured out that I don't give autographs!
Temperantia: (translated) Long before this universe came to be, the first Armageddon split reality into light, dark, and chaos. It was in this battle that those who rebelled against the light claimed dominion over the darkness. We have but one goal: resurrecting the Creator and reunifying the Trinity of Realities. We have but one goal: resurrecting the Creator and reunifying the Trinity of Realities. That shall be the purpose of your sacrifice!
Bayonetta: I'm not much for the talkative types. How about we have a little fun instead. You did plan on having fun with me, right? There will be plenty of time for pillow talk afterwards.
[The epic battle begins! Bayonetta breaks the angel to pieces, stopping the storm. Noticing the wolf-angel trying to sneak away quietly, she steps on his tail.]
Bayonetta: All done? Well, let me give you back your toy then!
[She spins the angel wolf over her head and throws it at Temperantia. The angel wolf crashes into a fuel truck on the fly, which nails Temperantia to the ground. Bayonetta drives a statue of a peeing angel into the fuel truck, which now pisses gasoline on Temperantia's face.]
Temperantia: (translated) He was right! So wonderfully right! Your eyes…
[Bayonetta ignites a trickle of gasoline flowing from Temperantia with her heel and strikes an epic pose not to look back at the explosion, but the fire is extinguished. Inhaling, Bayonetta shoots right into the pissing angel's dick and Temperantia explodes in laughs. Hands take him straight to, er...hell?]
Temperantia: (translated) May the Creator, Jubileus, grace you!
[Then Bayonetta suddenly remembers that she forgot to talk to him about her past.]
Bayonetta: Bugger. And I didn't make any time for pillow talk.
[She leaves. Jeanne, standing nearby, watched in silence...]
[Bayonetta walks along the Vigrid Highway.]
Bayonetta: The bridge in these heels? I don't suppose I can call a cab to get me to the island.
Military: Look alive people! We have an unidentified vehicle approaching. Close the gate!
[Bayonetta notices an APC traveling at high speed, driven by Luka with Cereza in the passenger seat. Bayonetta runs after the APC, jumping over the cars. She transforms into a panther and runs at the last split second through the closing gate. Reaching for her pistols, she shoots a heart-shaped hole in the gate, through which Luka's APC leaps.]
Luka: Woohoo! Did you see that!? I told you there was nothing to worry about!
Cereza: Mummy! Mummy saved us!
Luka: What!?
[Bayonetta opens the hatch.]
Bayonetta: Hello there, Cheshire.
Luka: Shit!
Cereza: Mummy!
Bayonetta: It seems your driving is on par with your journalism.
Luka: I figured I'd beat you to the island! But the guards had another idea, didn't they? Not really my best plan, huh?
Bayonetta: You think you've got me figured out, don't you?
Luka: We journalists have to have some detective skills, you know? You're after a gem stone. And that stone has to be in the Ithavoll Group Building. I'm headed there too.
Bayonetta: How odd. You seem to know where I'm going before I do. Yet you don't seem to know how to drive a car in a straight line.
Luka: What am I, a chauffeur!?
Bayonetta: Do you have any idea what prolonged walking in this salty air will do to my hair?
Luka: Well, I tend to use some product when I go to the beach.
[Explosions can be heard outside. They begin to be pursued by the military.]
Bayonetta: Little one! Get down! Put your foot down, Cheshire. I'll take care of our pest problem.
Luka: (sighs) Wonderful.
[There are angels on the roofs of military APCs.]
Bayonetta: I'm getting the distinct impression I'm not wanted on that island!? But love it when people play hard to get!
[She starts fighting angels on the roofs of cars, after which she finds herself a motorcycle, which she winds up with her middle finger.]
Bayonetta: Time to go vroom!
[After a frantic chase on a motorcycle, Bayonetta jumps on top of Luka's APC. However... The road in front is destroyed.]
Luka: Holy crap! For fuck's sake, that's overdoing it!
Bayonetta: Right! Turn Right! Get off the road!
[She stops time and jumps off the APC to several large angels named Braves.]
Bayonetta: I know you do want me here, but you really could have been more subtle about it.
[Bayonetta defeats them and breaks her spell. The bridge collapses, but she manages to teleport the APC through the angelic portal.]
[Bayonetta enters an abstract world of flying pieces of buildings in the air. Everything is flooded with a bright golden light and angelic singing is coming from somewhere.]
Bayonetta: Jesus. This is...
Voice: My dear, sweet child… Fear not, for I am watching over you…
[Bayonetta makes her way through the angelic city, battling crowds of various angelic monsters, even ships flying through the air. At the end she has to fight a huge ball transforming into various objects.]
[Bayonetta enters the very castle in which she was once imprisoned. She touches the walls with the palm of her hand as she walks down the long corridor. Touching old stains on the wall, she plunges into memories...]
Woman’s Voice: You may select opponents of your choice.
Bayonetta: Vigrid... I've been there before.
[She remembers again how Jeanne stabbed her with her dagger. She picks up from the floor a statue of two girls carved out of stone. Two names are written on the bottom.]
Bayonetta: Jeanne? Cereza? The little one?
[She will remember her imprisonment again. At that moment, the stems of a giant plant burst out from under the floor and grab Bayonetta's leg. She manages to shoot off the stem and the plant crawls away. Bayonetta squeamishly shakes off the leg with a piece of the stem left on it.]
Bayonetta: Tentacles... Why did it have to be tentacles?
[Bayonetta again has to go through practically the same town but with many differences. When she climbs to the top of the castle where a treacherous challenge awaits her, we switch to Luka and Cereza. They are walking in the woods.]
Cereza: What happened to Mummy?
Luka: Well, you see, she just went look for something, that's all. (to himself) I can't believe that witch. Placing a poor helpless child under her spell. If she did anything to this little girl's parents. I swear…
[Cereza falls suddenly.]
Cereza: (in tears) Mummy.
Luka: No need to cry... We'll get you to your mom in no time. Here, I've got some candy if you want.
Cereza: Mmm... What is this? It's yummy.
Luka: I don't know... It's candy Strawberry, I think?
Cereza: Hey kitty, I've got some yummies. Would you like some?
Luka: Is that cat your friend?
Cereza: Yes, this name is Cheshire. He's cute, isn't he?
Luka: Cheshire… What a stupid name. Well, so much for taking the highway… That just means we're just gonna have to find something else. Now all I have to figure out is what to do about you. So, Cerezita. That woman's really your mom?
Cereza: Uh-huh! My Mummy is strong and she protects me from scary monsters!
Luka: Monsters? I don't think you know who the real monsters are.
[Suddenly, the ground shook and some noise was heard. The screen fades. Bayonetta continues her journey and eventually encounters and defeats two flying Inspired dragons.]
[We go back to Luka and Cereza. They are at a loss as to what is going on.]
Cereza: Mummy! Help!
Luka: Don't panic! I'm here. There's no need to worry about a thing!
[One of the trees falls and Luka covers Cereza. Cereza looks out from behind the fallen tree and sees something in a cloud of dust.]
Cereza: Get them, Mummy! Get them!
Luka: Mommy?
Careza: Can't you see? Mummy's fighting the bad monsters for us. Mister, if you don't open your eyes you'll miss everything! Look with these.
[She gives him her glasses, touches them beforehand. Luka sees Bayonetta fighting the angels and falls on his ass, taking off the glasses. He recalls the fateful day when his father died.]
Young Luka: FATHER!!
Luka: Shit.
[He puts on the glasses again and grabs Cereza, trying to escape with her, but the angels surround him. Bayonetta kills the angels, followed by an earthquake that destroys the ground beneath their feet.]
Luka: OH NO!
[Bayonetta and Luka fall into a military base, and Bayonetta is immediately attacked by a giant plant she has encountered before.]
Luka: What the hell is that thing?
Cereza: Mummy!
Luka: Cerezita, this is way too dangerous!
[Cereza runs to her mother dodging stems. Luka runs after her and grabs her, but Cereza drops her stuffed cat. The plant tears off the cat's eye-button.]
Cereza: Cheshire!
[Bayonetta catches the toy cat. Luka escapes from the dangerous place with Cereza.]
Bayonetta: Well, kitty, what do you think we should do? He’s hurt you, has he? Well, we can't be having that now can we!?
[A huge angel Justitia, one of the four Auditio of the Hierarchy of Laguna. This creature has four faces with stems sticking out of it, emerging from under the ground. Bayonetta throws out the cat toy and prepares to fight.]
Bayonetta: Let's rock, baby!
[It turns the angel into a bloody meatball.]
Bayonetta: How about how, kitty? Still not enough you say? (to Justitia) You can go another round, can't you?
Justitia: (translated) It was as the Lumen Sage foretold. Your power is indeed magnificent.
Bayonetta: The Lumen Sage?
Justitia: (translated) Long have two eyes, one light and one dark, watched over the world and its history. It is this power that will allow the creator to start a new cycle of creation. Bayonetta, may Jubileus, the Creator, grace you!
[A portal appears from which arms are stretched out to take Justitia to hell.]
Bayonetta: Now where are my new best friends? I suppose one of them is an adult, so they should be ok.
[Meanwhile, Luka and Cereza are hiding nearby.]
Cereza: Excuse me, sir, may I have my glasses back?
Luka: Huh? Oh... Yeah… Here you go. Cereza, how did you get such... Magical glasses?
Cereza: The glasses aren't magic, silly. I can see the monsters without them!
Luka: Monsters... Not quite. So, uh, has Bayonetta, I mean your mom, been fighting these big bad monsters for a long time?
Cereza: Mummy is a witch, and witches protect people and are very strong. When I grow up, I'll be strong too and I'll protect my mummy!
Luka: Wait... You think witches do what!? Aww, forget it. No point in arguing with a little kid. I'll manage on my own.
Bayonetta: I'm sure you will.
[In a sudden moment of surprise, Luka falls and hits his head on a rusty pipe.]
Cereza: Mummy!
Luka: Shit!
Bayonetta: You never cease to amuse me, Cheshire. I suppose that's your next target? This is yours, little one. You didn't cry while I was gone, did you?
Cereza: Nope.
Bayonetta: Good.
Luka: Bayonetta... No matter how I ask, no matter how many times, you always say the same thing.
Bayonetta: Come now, kitty Yoshow It was all ju--
Luka: --a misunderstanding. You're so stubborn, you know that!? My father... He was a journalist, too. In fact, he was twice the man I could ever hope to be. He was obsessed with one case his entire career. A case so bizarre it took over his life. They could have made a movie of the details: The followers of darkness, the Umbra Witches, and their light world counterparts, the Lumen Sages, controlling everything with a power known as "The Eyes of the World." Then, the light and dark was suddenly disappeared from their medieval home in Europe. You may be familiar with the town. You're standing in it. Welcome to Vigrid, 500 years later.
Bayonetta: 500 years.
[Bayonetta again recalls the castle in which she was imprisoned, and Luka's voice echoes in the background of her memories.]
Luka: Each clan, working at the behest of the powers that be, sought to lead their fractured world towards peace. They both possessed an “Eye,” said to have the power to create history, that they used to oversee the world. However, their spirit of cooperation did not last, for amongst them, a pair of young star-crossed lovers conceived a child that sent the clans on a path to ruin. The woman was thrown in jail, and the man exiled from his clan. However, the child remained with the Umbra, raised as a black sheep, even amongst the darkness. Since the balance between light and dark had been lost, both clans spiraled into decay. Legend had it that the two "Eyes" could be united to control reality itself, and this legend fueled ambition and desire, leading to a myriad of battles between the clans. In fact, it led to their mutual destruction.
[The memory ends.]
Luka: My father was mocked for buying such a fairy tale; however, I believed his story. And I believe it more than ever now that I've found you.
[Bayonetta remembers the diver who found her coffin and opens it. As she breaks free, Bayonetta kills him, while little Luka watches.]
Luka: The memory of the clan ligers on, despite the passing of 500 years. What on earth was my father searching for? And why did he have to die for it? I have to discover the truth with my own eyes. That's why I haven't given up my chase for it. Or you. The head of the Ithavoll Group, the multi-national that dominates Vigrid, recently tried to sell an enormous gemstone on the black market. If he isn’t selling out in the pen it means we're going to have acquire it by other means. And that starts by sneaking on to that jet.
[He leaves. Cereza merrily runs up to Bayonetta and begins to copy her.]
Cereza: Mummy, are you looking for something?
Bayonetta: I am.
Cereza: How did you lose it?
Bayonetta: Little one, do you have anything you really like? Something really important to you?
[She digs in her pocket and pulls out a crescent-shaped medallion.]
Cereza: Yes! This! I love it.
[Bayonetta takes the medallion in her hands and remembers holding it out to Cereza through the bars of her cage.]
Bayonetta: Where did you get this?
Cereza: You gave it to me, mummy. For my birthday!
Bayonetta: When you love something, never lose it. Understand, little one?
[He takes one of the red ribbons out of his hair and ties it to the medallion.]
Bayonetta: You must keep it safe, close to your heart.
[She puts the medallion on Cereza and she runs off merrily playing with it. At that moment something bursts out of the ground and a car flies at Cereza. Suddenly Luka, using the Spider-Man gimmick, grabs her and carries her to the top of the jet.]
{By the way, the actor who voices Luka, Yuri Lowenthal, will be voicing Peter Parker in Marvel's Spider-Man in ten years!}
Bayonetta: Little one!
[Cereza slips out of Luka's hands and falls into the jet's vent.]
Luka: Cereza! Damn.
[Jet begins to take off. Luka falls off it, but the much more nimble Bayonetta jumps on the jet and stays on it. Luka is left to watch the Jet fly away.]
Luka: Shit!
[Bayonetta makes her way through the decks of the Valkyrie, aboard which she finds herself. She fights many strong angels and finally comes out, where she hears a familiar voice.]
Jeanne: Back to your old self, are we? Why so glum? Something troubling you?
Bayonetta: Only your constant fretting over my state of affairs. I've no time to play games with you.
Jeanne: No need to take out your stress on me, Bayonetta. It's clear you're worried for the girl.
[Instantly reacting to Jeanne's words, she leaps toward her and attacks with her long legs. They fight epically and after a while stand against each other, pointing their pistols.]
Bayonetta: Tell me where she is. Now.
Jeanne: My, aren't we attached to our precious little one? Do you like when she calls you “Mummy”?
Bayonetta: You're absolutely delusional. If I leave her, he'll never shut up about it. And his whining is twice as irritating as anything the child could muster.
Jeanne: (laughs) You've quite the tongue when it comes to curling round the truth.
Bayonetta: And what about you? What are you hiding? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think these might mean something to you.
[She throws at Jeanne's feet the very statue she found next to her dungeon. Jeanne throws it away.]
Jeanne: I've no need for worthless junk.
[A rumbling sound is heard from afar. Jeanne and Bayanetta turn around, pointing their pistols in the direction from which the rumbling sound came. A giant angel appears from the clouds.]
Huge Angel: (translated) Why must you needlessly stumble and stall? Have you forgotten the task with which you have been charged? Make haste, for the era of the Creator approaches!
Jeanne: I am well aware of my task! But you have forgotten that I do not need your help!
[She shoots at the angel and bangs his head on the flying plane. Angel tries to counterattack with a fireball, but misses and hits the wing of the plane.]
Jeanne: It seems your little friend is gone forever.
[She shoots Bayonetta, but she dodges the shots, gathers all the bullets in a pile and turns them into a small spear that she throws at Jeanne. As Jeanne dodges, Bayonetta flies up to her.]
Jeanne: Fill them! Fill your eyes with hatred. Accept your violent fate! Accept it and earn the Left Eye! Prove you deserve it!
Voice: Fear not my child, for no harm will come to you. I'm always watching over you... My dear, sweet child.
[Bayonetta confronts Jeanne and defeats her. She remembers that Cereza was left on the plane!]
Bayonetta: Cereza!
[She runs inside the plane.]
Jeanne: Not yet. She isn't ready.
[Bayonetta, meanwhile, runs through the crumbling plane in search of little Cereza.]
Bayonetta: Little one! Where are you!? Little one! Can you hear me!?
[Cereza is hiding behind a stack of boxes. She is all in tears.]
Cereza: Mummy! Mummy! Mummy!
Bayonetta: Cereza!
Careza: Mummy! I was so scared.
Bayonetta: No crying now, little one. You know the rules - No cockroaches or crying babies. Time to go, little one. Hold on tight, OK?
Careza: Okay.
[Bayonetta takes the little girl with her. And she has to fight the angels and keep her safe! In the end, the plane falls into the ocean.]
[Bayonetta and Cereza are standing on the wing of a plane in the middle of the ocean. Luka arrives in a helicopter and jumps onto the wing.]
Luka: Let's go!
[Bayonetta notices a huge angel in the ocean and gives Cereza to Luka.]
Careza: Mummy! Mummy!
Bayonetta: It's OK, little one. I'll be right back.
[She pulls out her guns. Luka climbs up on a rope to the helicopter with Cereza in his hands.]
Careza: Mummy! Mummy!
Huge Angel: (translated) The woman fled so swiftly. I am reminded why we have come to rely upon the unreliable nature of humanity.
[It is Sapientia, one of the four Auditio of the Hierarchy of Laguna.]
Sapientia: (translated) A valuable lesson, but not my purpose. I have come to evaluate you and denomine whether you are worthy of your role in the resurrection of the Creator, Jubileus.
[Bayonetta tosses a lamppost into his giant mouth, blocking it.]
Bayonetta: Another talkative type. I don't think I've got time to entertain your blather. I'd much rather hear it straight from your boss.
Sapientia: (translated) You speak of our boss!? The resurrection 500 years ago fell victim to his human ineptitude, and we were unable to revive the Creator. However, I must thank the Sage for his witch hunts. His impetus eradicated a vile clan from this Earth.
Bayonetta: The witch hunts?
Sapientia: (translated) Thanks to his efforts, this town has become a source of strength and we've gained a foothold strong enough to orchestrate the Creator's resurrection. All that remains is awakening the Left Eye, and uniting the Eyes of the World. Then the new era of creation shall arrive!
[He attacks Bayonetta with his clawed paw and breaks the wing of the plane she was standing on. Bayonetta uses the wreckage as a surfboard and, surfing around the giant, fights it. She breaks his legs and summons a giant demonic spider, who weaves a web in a whirlpool and catches the giant in it.]
Bayonetta: I have no idea why you would want this stone, it would look absolutely terrible on you. Much too flashy.
Sapientia: (translated) Stone? You think this is all about some worthless rock! (laughs) May Jubileus, the Creator, grace you! (laughs)
[They take him to hell. Bayonetta jumps up on the wreckage to the helicopter, starting time again and ending up in it even before Luka does!]
Bayonetta: Welcome aboard, Cheshire.
Luka: (almist fell out) Oh, fucking hell!
Careza: Mummy!
Bayonetta: I told you I'd be right back. (to Luka) Shouldn't you be, you know, flying this thing? I'm a bit occupied at the moment.
Luka: Well, so much for the subtle approach. We might as well have speakers on this thing blaring Ride of the fucking Valkyries.
Bayonetta: Come now. We're VIPs. You know, nothing says you've made it in life like a private helicopter.
Luka: Then welcome aboard Air Luka Flight 001. This is your captain, LUKA, speaking. Fasten your safety belts as this may be a bumpy flight.
[They fly toward the island in the center of which rises an ominous-looking tower.]
Luka: You're really not going to like what comes next. I hope you know that.
Bayonetta: Don't tell me. Air Cheshire has awful in-flight entertainment and horrendous food?
Luka: Think about it. Those things that downed the jet aren't just going to let us land on their island. You think we can just say “Hey, we're here!” and they'll bring us a cake? Things look good up from up here. But the further down you go the harder it is to not notice the reality... of things.
[He concentrates his gaze on Bayonetta's breasts.]
Bayonetta: Cheshire. Look.
Luka: Oh... I'm lookin'.
[He finally looks away and turns his gaze to notice two missiles flying at them.]
Luka: Oh, fuck me!
[The missile hits the helicopter and it explodes, but it does not kill the heroes - they are already flying on the missile itself, which is a phallic symbol.]
Bayonetta: Welcome to my fantasy zone. Get ready!
[The game turns into a bullet hell, where we are invited to control the missile.]
Cereza: It's brilliant, mummy!
[Bayonetta, extremely pleased with herself, flies into town on the missile. However... Next to her, flying in the opposite direction, Jeanne flies on a missile! They begin to fight.]
Jeanne: Welcome to Isla del Sol, island of wealth and power!
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
Jeanne: If you've made it this far, that should be enough! You're back to your old self. This is where we finish what was started so long ago.
[She presses a button and fires several missiles.]
Bayonetta: A friend of my enemy is also my enemy. Be it Witch or Sage.
Jeanne: The Lumen Sage They were our counterbalance as overseers. Between us here was a law that was never to be broken. It stated that “The intersection of light and dark would bring calamity to this earth.”
[She launches more missiles.]
Jeanne: But 500 years ago, a child was born in clear violation of this tenet. That child was you.
Bayonetta: 500 years ago.
Jeanne: The disaster this cal sed sentit clans into a spiral of chaos that continues to be felt to this day. You, the half-breed of light and dark, are center of that chaos. Allowing you to continue to exist is a danger that cannot be accepted.
[Bayonetta recalls again the day Jeanne stabbed her with the dagger.]
Jeanne: (in the past) When the Eyes of the World are within our grasp, the power of creation will be awakened. This is why the Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another!
Jeanne: The Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another. Bayonetta, it is time that this is brought to an end. That you are brought to an end
Bayonetta: You... You did it.
Jeanne: It is our charge as witches to protect the treasures of the clan… By any means necessary. Even if it means burning every inch of this island to a crisp.
[At that moment Luka flies over her in a truck. He uses his hook to take the detonator from Jeanne's hands.]
Luka: I'm really beginning to hate missiles. You know, I have no idea what the hell you girls got going on here, but you don't mind if I take this off your hands, do ya? Get in, Cerezita.
[They leave in a truck. Jeanne tries to catch up with them, but Bayonetta stops her.]
Cereza: Mummy… Mummy!
[Luka truck runs into a wall and explodes!]
Bayonetta: Cheshire! Cereza...
Jeanne: Bayonetta. Time is of the essence. This can wait no longer!
[They fight epically on the roof of a building, on a rocket, and even on a steep wall. Jeanne even changes into a white suit, but it doesn't help her and she loses anyway.]
Bayonetta: Now it's decided.
Jeanne: So it is. The fear is still not gone from your eyes...
Bayonetta: Fear?
Jeanne: The memories you've held for 500 years are the source of your fear. They cloud your vision. But now you’ve accepted your fate. That is how you bested me. That is why you possess the most beloved of Umbran treasures. That is why you possess the Left Eye.
Bayonetta: We fought for this stone… And because of it everyone died.
[She takes a red stone out of her locket on her chest. Jeanne takes it and looks at it.]
Jeanne: That gem brings back so many memories...
[The inscriptions that have appeared from the stone awaken memories in Bayonetta again.]
Jeanne: (in the past) That is why the Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! I will not stand for the wild ambition of a treacherous Lumen Sage who disrupted our age old balance. Your path ends here!
[She shoots the masked Bayonetta and turns her into a red gemstone.]
Jeanne: (in the past) Do not fear your fate. Stand... Cereza.
Jeanne: In the innocence of our childhood we used to play together as friends. But as time passed, perhaps even my eyes were clouded with fear.
Bayonetta: We were...?
Jeanne: Do not fear your fate. Stand, Cereza. Stand and open your eyes. For with every truth, there is another one to be seen.
[She pulls out her gun and shoots, but Bayonetta dodges. At this point several missiles fly into the building and Bayonetta is thrown into the next building.]
Bayonetta: Jeanne.
[The elevator doors open and out comes Luka with Cereza in his arms. Bayonetta grasps.]
Lika: Is it over!? What!? It's me like you don't scare the shit out of me all the time!?
Bayonetta: Cereza! I don't know whether to shoot you or take you to Vegas for good luck, Cheshire.
Luka: Give me more credit than that If you must know… Where L.U.K.A. Luka is concerned, there's no such thing as luck. Only skill. You didn't expect me to trust bitches… I mean witches, did you, Bayonetta!?
Bayonetta: How's the little one?
Luka: Out like a light, but OK other than that. What about you? You really think I'm gonna let myself be seen in public with a girl looking all beat up like that?
[He gives her a candy.]
Bayonetta: I look dreadful, do I? You'll have to learn to wipe that stupid look off your face or I'll never let you keep chasing me around this world. Got that? Luka.
Luka: (laughs) Now that's more like it.
[Bayonetta and Luka, with Cereza in his arms, approach the tall golden doors that are the entrance to the tower. Cereza wakes up.]
Bayonetta: Welcome back, little one.
Cereza: Mummy... Where are we?
Luka: It looks like someone's expecting us. Awfully nice of them to roll out the red carpet.
Bayonetta: Luka, you need to get one thing straight--
Luka: Yeah. I know. "I won't look after you, so don't screw up." I got things under control.
Bayonetta: Let's go. Stay next to me, little one.
Voice: Rise my child! Rise to realize your true potential! Unleash your power and awaken the Eyes of the World!
Cereza: Daddy...!?
Bayonetta: What?
Cereza: Daddy! It's Daddy!
Bayonetta: Daddy?
Cereza: Of course, Mummy! Can't you hear him? OK, Daddy. I'm coming… And I'll bring Mummy with me.
[She runs into the tower.]
Bayonetta: Little one, wait!
Cereza: This way, Mummy!
Bayonetta: Little one!
[She runs after the girl. The doors of the tower close.]
Luka: Cerezita!? Bayonetta!? Damn it.
[He has to find another way in. Bayonetta, on the other hand, climbs the Ithvoll Building stairs in her usual way - killing crowds of angels. Having climbed to the top and once again fought all the same bosses, Bayonetta passes through the road of light and enters a spherical portal.]
[Bayonetta enters a vast auditorium, with a giant round window at the far end. Behind the pulpit in a high chair sits a man with a queer voice. On his lap sits Cereza.]
Sage: What follows those living in the light is nothing but the profound, empty darkness born from the shadow that longer as they approach the brilliant radiance. To truly see your eyes must be open to both light and dark. Don't you agree, my dear child?
[Bayonetta enters through the portal.]
Cereza: Mummy's here! Mummy's here! Mummy!
Bayonetta: Little one...
Sage: You've arrived… My dear, sweet Cereza. My, my... Why the grim face, my dear. As a child, your smile was warmer than the sun.
Bayonetta: So, you are the last of the Lumen Sages.
Sage: I am indeed. My name is Balder. But if you so choose, you may address me as Father. There is much you have forgotten. It has been 500 years since we last met. If your memories were still intact, this would have been a much more emotional reconciliation.
Bayonetta: How did you get the girl?
Balder The Sage: Where shall I begin? We, the Lumen Sages, and your Umbra Witches, as long become the overseers of history, each bearing witness with their own "eye." This is how our universe's existence was preserved. However, for 500 years, you have been exiled from the world's affairs. You are the Left Eye of the Eyes of the World.
Bayonetta: Could you dispense with the rides and just tell me what these sodding Eyes actually are!
Balder The Sage: Your years of slumber have caused you to forget many things, even as we stand on the verge of the resurrection of the Creator… The resurrection of Jubileus. There is but one way to return your epoch of forgotten memories and open your eye of the overseer. Your uncorrupted eye had to be exposed to the history it could not see. Ah… Your battles… Your struggles… Everything you've experienced in this town has been a stepping stone to your enlightenment. It has all been done for the Left Eye.
[Bayonetta pulls out her gun.]
Bayonetta: I've had enough of your philosophical pretensions. I won't ask again. Where did you get the girl?
Balder The Sage: Your question has been answered. All this has been done to awaken the Left Eye. For that, you had to see yourself once more.
Bayonetta: You are truly beyond salvation, Sage.
Balder The Sage: Ahh... Salvation. Such a curious word. I marked the path to salvation with light. However, no matter how brilliant that light grows, the darkness within the human heart grows even darker. Light, Dark, and Chaos between… Three realities once split shall be brought together to create a new universe in the image of the old. To these ends, leading to the Festival of Resurrection 500 years ago. I fanned the flames of terror spurring on the witch hunts. However, despite the people belief in the return of Jubileus, the Creator, the Left Eye was out of reach. Since then, I have devoted myself to this town's prosperity and now it is time for my preparations to bear fruit. Jubileus will be resurrected, we will become the Eyes of the World, and a new universe will take hold!
[Bayonetta recalls the events of 500 years ago. She is holding her dead mother in her arms.]
Masked Bayonetta: Mummy!
Bayonetta: I could never call the man behind this nightmare "Father"!
Luka: (clapping) Great speech, big guy.
Bayonetta: Luka.
Luka: Getting a bit ahead of ourselves, aren't we Mr. Big Shot Ithavoll Executive? Salvation, light… You take this entrepreneurial philosophy a bit seriously, don't ya? But it's all diarrhea of the mouth, if you ask me. History is littered with famous genocidal figures just like you… Or should I say infamous genocidal figures.
Balder The Sage: You must be Luka, journalist extraordinaire. I must say, I'm truly impressed you've made it this far, child. Like father, like son, I suppose.
Luka: What?
Balder The Sage: Luka, Luka, Luka… Your father had problems with my philosophies. It's fine to investigate, but when malicious rumors start to spread I must see to it that they come to a stop. For being kind enough to ascertain that my long lost Cereza was at the bottom of some lake, I granted him his final wish, and accepted his permanent resignation.
Luka: You bastard!
[Angels fly up to him and grab his arms and legs, lifting Luka into the air.]
Young Like: FATHER!!
Balder The Sage: You are of no use to me; however, I am not without dignity. I will allow you to die in the same manner as your father.
[He snaps his fingers. The angels start pulling him in different directions, but Bayonetta kills them with the gun. Balder grabs Luka with telekinesis and, breaking several walls with his body, throws him out the window. Bayonetta doesn't have time to catch up with him.]
Bayonetta: Luka!!
Balder The Sage: Well, I guess my plan has gone right out the window. (smirks) Such a shame that sacrificed to be made. But if destiny is not fulfilled soon, this tragedy will be repeated ad nauseam. Speaking of tragedy, I suppose you've met Jeanne? Well, she sealed you away and kept you from trouble after falling into our hands, she's been incredibly useful. Although her distinct lack of obedience required a bit of mental… reprogramming. Her tragic end led you directly to me, just as planned. The time for awakening the Left Eye is soon. Fear not, my dear sweet Cereza.
[Bayonetta shoots him, but Balder stops time and redirects the bullets, then grabs Bayonetta by the throat.]
Balder The Sage: That is it, Cereza. Do not fear your fate. Stand tall, my child. Realize your true potential!
[He tosses Bayonetta aside and lifts Cereza into the air with telekinesis.]
Balder The Sage: Cereza, we are one, my child.
[He absorbs Cereza turning into a peacock angel. Cereza's head protrudes from his chest. The top of the tower explodes, and Bayonetta flies into the abyss on the wreckage. Father Balder flies up to her. Time stands still and they begin to fight! Bayonetta finds a way to overpower the unstoppable Sage and loads her lipstick into her gun.]
Bayonetta: Don't fuck with a witch!
[She shoots her lipstick right into Balder's head!]
Father Balder: May Jubileus, The Creator, grace you!
[His corpse falls into his own ruined auditorium. Bayonetta snaps her finger and a missile flies into the auditorium with Luka clinging to her decorative ornament. He falls to the ruins and shakes himself off.]
Luka: I've got to give you credit, Bayonetta. You never cease to impress.
Bayonetta: You haven't seen the half of it.
Luka: Oh, I've seen enough… Well, that about wraps it up, huh?
Bayonetta: Not yet.
[Bayonetta uses her Left Eye on the round window of the auditorium and goes back in time. She puts Cereza to sleep.]
Cereza: Mummy... Daddy...
Bayonetta: No need to be afraid, little one. The nightmare is over. Everything was just a dream. You're a strong little girl. There is nothing you cannot overcome.
Cereza: Mummy… Did you find it? What you were looking for?
Bayonetta: Yes, I found it. So don't you worry anymore. You just keep your treasure safe too. Sweet dreams, little one.
[She sings “Fly to the Moon”. The circular window of the auditorium cracks and we return to the present. Bayonetta is in pain and begins to emit a red glow. She recalls events both distant and recent.]
Bayonetta: When you love something, never lose it. Understand, little one? You must keep it safe, close to your heart.
Masked Bayonetta: I'm not afraid anymore, Mummy. No matter what… There's nothing I cannot do.
Luka: Bayonetta! What's happening to you!?
[He tries to touch her, but gets electrocuted.]
Father Balder: And now it is done. The Right Eye oversees the light, the Left Eye oversees the darkness. Two eyes to oversee the world. It was never the woman known as "Bayonetta" that I set my sights upon. It was you as a child, Cereza, that I sought. For she was the one who saw the ward through innocent eyes, and she was the one who give rise to a new history. It was her energy that could awaken the Left Eye. This was all worked out splendidly. Let us begin, Cereza. The time is at hand.
[He ascends with Bayonetta to the top of the tower.]
Father Balder: Now the resurrection of Jubileus shall be completed. We are the eyes, overseeing the world. We are the eyes over seeing a new era… A new reality… To which we will devote ourselves eternally.
[He flies up to the giant statue of the woman and enters her forehead. The statue opens its eye. In her left, blue eye we see Father Balder, and in her right, red eye we see Bayonetta.]
Father Balder: May Jubileus the Creator, grace all of its creations!
[The tower turns into a rocket... the adepts of the cult watch it with bated breath... Suddenly a motorcycle appears! Jeanne rushes to the rescue!]
Jeanne: Thank god. There's still time…
[We see that she saves herself from the explosion with a red gemstone, which in addition broke Balder's mental control. She jumps on the monocycle to the rocket.]
Jeanne: The Left Eye, our treasure Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! It is the pride of the Umbra Witches!
[She rides at breakneck speed through the tower itself.]
Father Balder: Ahh… Jeanne. You've provided me with many blessings. The one and only, authentic Left Eye. Merely seeing it muss jealousy within you. Your body must yearn to feel a new universe form around it.
Jeanne: I have no intentions of gazing upon the Left Eye. I am here to reclaim my Umbran sister!
[Balder concentrates energy and destroys an entire asteroid, causing a stream of firestones to fall on Jeanne. She dodges it and gets to the head of the statue.]
Father Balder: The time has come for Jubeleus to return! At last, the Trinity of Realities will know their real ruler, and time will begin anew!
Jeanne: Cereza! Wake up!
[She dips her hands into the electrified gel trying to reach the unconscious Bayonetta.]
Father Balder: Are you insane!? Light and Dark. Unless both eyes remain, the universe will lose its balance and face another armageddon!
[He tries to shoot a white ball into her back, but Jeanne still manages to get Bayonetta out.]
Jeanne: Then this thing should have slept for eternity! Now you must wake up, Cereza! Cereza! Cereza! Damn you! Open your eyes!
Bayonetta: Jeanne...?
Jeanne: Cereza, you aren't the person I sealed away 500 years ago. You have the strength to overcome this and fight. Finish this!
[Meanwhile, the transformation begins even without Bayonetta. A stream of energy carries Jeanne away from the statue.]
Father Balder: My, oh my… No one can control Jubeleus now. Its power is too intense… Light, dark, human. All the side, all the struggle… The Trinity of Realities wrapped up in a vortex of creation!
[The statue comes to life and turns into Jubileus. She creates a protective barrier around herself to prevent Bayonetta from escaping. Bayonetta prepares for battle.]
Bayonetta: Rest, my friend. I'm off to get that black cat.
[She defeats Jubileus and summons a giant Hindu goddess many tens of times larger than Jubileus. The goddess kisses her fist and hits Jubileus with such force that she flies into the atmosphere of the Earth and burns!!!]
[Bayonetta hangs in the air, giving her all her strength... The credits begin, but... Jeanne comes in and tramples them with her heel.]
Jeanne: Unbelievable. We managed to stop this abomination and it's still going to destroy the world!
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
[She once again survives by using her own motorcycle.]
Jeanne: Come now. You're one of a kind. If you die here, who is going to save the world? I’ll send you home, even if it kills me… Now let's finish this.
Bayonetta: You and I are going home together! Jeanne, we're both one of a kind!
Jeanne: Now those are the eyes I've been waiting to see.
[Together they destroy the statue falling to Earth.]
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
Jeanne: I'm OK!
Bayonetta: Let's go! Just stay close to me!
[They fall to Earth from space… Meanwhile, on Earth, the cult's adepts and Luka are watching what's happening in the sky.]
Luka: OK. This is getting ridiculous! How do you keep surviving all this!? I bet you're trying to sneak up on me right now… Aren't you, Bayonetta!?
[He turns sharply, but there is no one behind him. Next scene. The cemetery from the beginning of the game. A funeral is taking place.]
Enzo: Well, no rest for the wicked. But at least she's at peace, back in the box she came from. And I guess I'm gonna have to find a new racket to line my pockets. No bonus for Old Enzo this time. As fuckin' usial.
Rodin: You know how it works with witches, Enzo. They make a deal with the devil, and when they die, the devil gets his due. Ya get sucked down into hell, and wandering around scared shitless for eternity… kinda comes with the territory.
Enzo: Why you tellin’ me this!? Is this not why we are standing here, praying for her soul to rest in peace!? I better not be out here catchin' a fucking cold if these prayers don't mean nothing!
[Rodin grabs him and takes off his cigar.]
Rodin: It’s nice to think your prayers are worth a damn, isn't it? You made a killing exploiting her. Hell, you never know, she might get lonely and come back to haunt your ass!
Enzo: Haunt me! Hell can keep her then!
[Someone comes with two large bouquets of flowers, because of which the person himself is not visible. It’s Luka, as we soon learn.]
Luka: I said I’d never give up chasing you… I just never thought the chase end up like this. Rosemary. You said it was a demon repellent. It might help you on the road ahead…
[He kisses her goodbye and walks away. The nun smiles mischievously… Rays of bright light come from the sky and angelic singing can be heard.]
Enzo: Hey... Hey! Wait a second? What the hell are they coming down here to get her for!?
Nun?: Of course they'd come for the prize they've been seeking all along.
Luka: Holy shit! Your...
[The nun jumps through the portal and kills the three angels just like at the beginning of the game.]
Nun?: This looks ridiculous on me!
[She takes off her nun's robe and turns out to be Jeanne.]
Jeanne: I swear, this is the last time I cosplay.
[Jeanne battles the angels. Rodin knocks on the coffin.]
Rodin: You hear that!? That's your cue!
Jeanne: Will you hurry up!? Don’t tell me you fell asleep in that thing again!
Enzo: Hey! What the… You gotta fuckin' be kidding me… You tellin' me she's… Un-be-fucking-lievable!
[Bayonetta jumps out of the coffin.]
Bayonetta: Morning! What's with shoving me into this filthy old casket!? And next time, some air holes would be nice. Fewer worms, ideally...
Jeanne: Save the chit-chat for later. We've got work to do.
[They kill the angels and Luka realizes that he has fallen in love.]
Lika: Extra ingenue?
Bayonetta: It has a bit of rosemary. In the language of flowers, rosemary equates to remembrance… Suits me now, doesn’t it? Let's dance, boys!
[CREDITS]
[During the credits, we are shown the statistics of the playthrough, as well as give us a chance to fight for the last time.]
THE END
Man’s Voice: Rise my Child! Rise to realize your true potential! Unleash your power and awaken the Eyes of the World!
[Two witches fight a horde of angels on a piece of clock tower flying down at tremendous speed.]
Narrator: Long since erased from the records of time, there once existed two European Clans who served as overseas of history for the powers that be: The Umbra Witches, dwellers of the darkness, and the Lumen Sages, controllers of light. The clans paid each other great respect, and their efforts to maintain the balance between them defended the just passage of time. Yet, one day, that balance was toppled. The once harmonious clans fell into disagreement and stoked the flames of hatred against each other, resulting in an era of strife. The conflict between the Umbra and the Lumen threw all of Europe into a chaotic loop of battle, ambush, assassination; and casualty. It was truly a gruesome war. Despite the tremendous radiance of God shining upon them, the Lumen Sages were gradually weakened by the assault of the secretive dark witches. Years after the balance was lost, the war had ended in the Umbra Witches' favor. Their victory was short-lived. Fearing the witches’ dark abilities, humans began to condemn the remaining Umbra. They launched the witch hunts, rounding up the battle-weary witches with little resistance and subjugating those who wished to continue the struggle. Human faith in the miracles of their God pushed the witch hunts further, and soon the Umbra Witches, keepers of the darkness, were extinguished from the Earth. All but one.
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
Jeanne: I'm OK!
Bayonetta: Let's go! Just stay close to me!
PRESENT DAY
[The scene changes to a plane, where a group of fanatics is reciting some kind of prayer and then stabbing themselves with daggers. One of the witches, Jeanne, is watching from the shadows.]
Prologue: The Vestibule
[We get to a cemetery. After flying the camera over the tombstones with the names of the developers on them, we see a tombstone with the name of Hideki Kamiya, the chief designer, on which some man named Enzo pisses.]Enzo: It looks like Humpty Dumpty's taken his last fall. Even old Eggman the Destroyer gets scrambled in the end, right? You know, I still don't get why the hell you drag me out here for these things. I just drop off the merchandise. Hey, bet you can't guess what today is? Readin' the good lord's book ain't gonna do much. People been waiting for this asshole to get whacked for ages. Hell, look around. There‘s no love lost for old Humpty Dumpty. But you gotta keep the outfit happy. We don't take care of him, they take care of us. and I prefer my shoes made out of rubber, not concrete. But hey, it's that kinda town. Without good hearted souls like us to put these bastards six feet under, where'd society be? Course, the pay‘s not bad either. Jesus, you really get into this shit, dontcha? If it were me, I’d be praying he ends up barbecue... Or at least Sunny side up! You can keep praying, but the only way this guy‘s meeting the Lord is if God's hungry for breakfast! Speaking of hungry, we done here? My kids are baking me a birthday cake tonight. Cute little fuckers, I tell ya what... Well then, adios!
[He throws his cigar over the coffin. Suddenly the cemetery is illuminated by a bright light, coming as if from heaven.]
Enzo: What the fuck? They're here!? For this douchebag!? I hate this damn light! I can't see a thing! But they're there... Ain't they!? You hearin' me!? You can see them, can't you!?
Nun: I see them. They are instruments of God, descending upon his heavenly rays to Earth. Dear Lord, guidance and keep safe for the souls of our loved ones for all eternity.
Enzo: Oh… My… God...
Nun?: You look tired. Let me tuck you in.
Enzo: Oh shit! C'mon! It's my frickin’ birthday! Mother of Mary! I didn't mean all that Humpty Dumpty shit, I swear!
Rodin: Next time you wanna lay hands on me, you better make sure I'm dead. Now move out the way. Go!!!
Enzo: Ro-Ro-Rodin?!
Rodin: If it ain't my good buddy, Enzo. How bout you get outta here? You die, and I'm gonna have to go back in that hole chasin' after the money you owe me.
Nun?: Do you naughty little angels deserve a good spanking?
Rodin: Beautiful. Bayonetta!
Bayonetta: Now this is cheeky, throwing me these cheap toys!
Rodin: Don't worry about quality. I've got quantity!
Bayonetta: Guns! Guns! Guns! Guns!
Rodin: If you just gonna watch, I’m putting you two to work! That was your last call. No more guns from me, Bayonetta!
Bayonetta: As long as there’s music, I’ll keep on dancing.
(GAMEPLAY)
Enzo: I'm not dead yet! You can't take me like this! It's against regulations. I tell ya! Ahhhh!! Damn it! Who did that!? I just bought the damn thing!
Bayonetta: Haven't you figured it out yet!? There's no quarter for you in this world!
[]
Bayonetta: Rodin should be paying me for even touching these toys.
Enzo: You have any idea how much this is going to cost to fix!? How the fuck do I always get wrapped up in this shit!?
Bayonetta: Engine still purrs nicely. Now, about this little thing you've been looking into for me, Enzo. Let's have a quick chat...
Enzo: See!? This is why I told you I was going home! I just got held up in the air by some invisible... things... and you want an intelligence briefing!? It never stops with you.
Rodin: You keep bellyachin' like that and you're liable to wake Eggman from the dead. And I don't think either of you would like that. Catch you later, Bayonetta. Something tells me you're going to need a rush on our special project. Before the shit hits the fan.
Enzo: Wait! Rodin! What about Eggman!?
Bayonetta: Such a popular chap. I bet they hate him down there as much as you did when he was up here. We just need to make sure he won't come crawling back when they kick him out.
Rodin: Nothing a flower bed can't fix. Fill 'er up.
Bayonetta: You heard the man. Finish up in 5 minutes or you're walking home to your cake and candles.
Enzo: What!? Don't you leave me here! What a day! I'm screwed! Its gonna take every cent I earned on this charade; to pay for the damage... I tell you what, if l could see them bastards that did this to my car, fuggetaboutit!
Bayonetta: Enzo. The road? Pay attention, dear.
Enzo: How can you be so calm!? You're still getting screwed in all this, too! Of all the lowlife scum in too deep in this town, I've never seen one get wrapped up in a fight with god's messengers. Dressed like a nun, too. When you end up in the afterlife, that's not going to be pretty!
Bayonetta: I can't help it if I like the little outfits. The toys are nice, too.
Enzo: 20 years ago, you woke up stuck in a casket at the bottom of a lake. All you can remember is that you're a witch. But now you're stuck, because you've gotta sacrifice our halo-wearing friends everyday or they'll drag your ass back down to hell. I know I thought I got screwed, but bein' forced to slap around the divine for a livin'? That's really getting screwed!
Bayonetta: If I needed a biographer, you wouldn't be my first choice. I see to the funeral, you get me the information I asked for. That was our deal.
Enzo: Come on now! Look at my poor car! I'm working for free after this. At least let me get a drink at Rodin’s before you start drilling me. The info I got is good. It's gonna get you close to finding the other stone in the pair, and figuring out some of that lost past of yours. I swear. After jewels instead of cash! Just like a girl! Jesus! Can't you take a joke!?
Bayonetta: Enzo... Someone's given you a present. Too bad I can't stand bugs.
Enzo: Huh? What the fuck!?
Bayonetta: You!?
Jeanne: What’s the matter, Bayonetta? All that sleeping made you soft?
(GAMEPLAY)
Bayonetta: That girl…
Rodin: Those assholes sure know how to get attention. Even perked the ears of the hot heads down home.
Bayonetta: You don't say.
Rodin: It's getting harder and harder to tell the worlds apart. Human world. Inferno. Paradiso. Who can tell the difference?
Bayonetta: Even harder with Purgatorio in the middle. Fight long enough in there and you'll really lose sight. Why the sudden interest in metaphysics?
Rodin: It's a balance, right? Even if some of them like messin' around with the humans, we‘ve all got a stake in the status quo. But people keep fuckin' around like this, the Book of Revelations is gonna look like mother goose. Heaven and Hell are gonna go straight for each other's throats.
Bayonetta: Heaven and Hell can tear each other to pieces for all I care. I've got my own problems to worry about.
Rodin: Something's up. Everything was a bit too brazen, and Enzo's tip makes the timing too perfect. This reeks of a set up. Someone in one of those lost memories calling you out. I got a little present for you. These babies are special. Built from an alloy the devil himself would kill to get his hands on. Don't break these, cuz they're one-of-a-kind.
Bayonetta: Calling me out? I don't go in for strange offers. Then again, I'm getting a little tired of these weaklings they keep throwing at me. Maybe I should aim for something a bit more... High class.
Rodin: Pounding them down tonight, baby. Not to butt into your affairs, but I'm pretty sure you got somewhere better to be. The guys you're up against aren't the I m type to wait for you to finish a round. Enzo! Her drinks are goin' on your tab, buddy! Ya deadbeat motherfucker.
Chapter I: The Angel’s Metropolis
Enzo: So, I asked around, and some whale in Europe is trying to fence a huge rock on the black market. He calls it the "Right Eye," saying it's part of some set called "The Eyes of the World." Fits the bill of what you are after, don’t it? Now here's the funny bit. The stone passes around the halls of power for hundreds of years, vanishes, and then the black market goes white hot for the thing. But the seller wanted an arm and a leg for it, to the point no one could stomach the price. So back goes the stone. But not before everyone figures out where the guy is! You’re gonna enjoy doing this one I bet. I love stickin’ it to the rich. Of course, when you do, don’t forget your old buddy Enzo stuck his neck out for this one. Slide me a few fazoles out of the rich guy’s pocket for my troubles, right!? Anyways, you better get going before the trail gets cold. Off to the middle-of-nowhere. Paradise of Europe. Vigrid.(Bayonetta abruptly wakes up in train like from a nightmare. She dreamed of the girl she saw.)
Train Announcer: Welcome to Vigrid, your final stop. Entry Visas are required of all travelers. Please submit your Vigrid issued Entry Visa for inspection upon disembarking. Please make sure you take all your valuable belongings with you. Repeating this message...
Man’s Voice: You have arrived at last, my dear. The time has come to awaken The Eyes of the World. Fear not, my dear child. Such a beautiful young lady you've become. I'll always see to it no harm comes to you.
Bayonetta: (leaving the train) So… This is supposed to be paradise?
(Some time later she meet Rodin again.)
Rodin: I knew it. This town's teeming with heaven's little helpers. It's making my buddies downstairs awfully nervous.
Bayonetta: And your point is?
Rodin: Some places in this world are closer to Paradiso or Inferno. The rathole of a town you and I live in is close to both, but the Vigridians got this special air about 'em. They're Closer to Paradiso than anyone should ever be. And that shit just plain creeps me out. Heh, I guess I‘m gonna have to set up shop here and score me some halos. These stupid rings are worth a fortune back home. Since it seems you‘re spoiling for a fight, if you come across any of these, bring 'em to me and I'll hook you up. Another one looking to line his pockets. Huh. I'm beginning to see why Enzo is so fond of you.
Rodin: Real cute. But let's get one thing straight, your fights are yours alone. I'm only here to watch my handiwork in action. So don't get any bright ideas about coming to me for help.
Bayonetta: No, you get one thing straight. I'm not the slightest bit interested in the fact that you made these guns. If you get in my way, I will, how do the Americans put it? Oh yes. Bust a cap in yo’ ass.
Rodin: Right on, baby! Right on!
(From now on Bayonetta can buy weapons and items from Rodin. She go to his shop.)
Rodin: You’re here for business or pleasure? Either way, I'll hook you up.
(Bayonetta enters the portal and goes back in time. Two witches approach her.)
Witch: What are you doing!? Let’s go!
(They fight with a huge angel head. After some time, the head flies away, and the bayonet returns to its time. She enters the Gates of Hell.)
Rodin: Well, well... An Angelic Hymns Gold LP... Got your hands on something awfully rare, haven't ya? That thing is the perfect bait to coax out some a of hell's uglies. One note hits their ears, and a damn who's who of Inferno comes pouring out of the inner circles. Then I can use them to breath life into what I make best... weapons of mass destruction. Tell ya what. You give me that record, and I'll order up something so fiendish. angels will cry at the sight of it. I'll just have to pop down to the tropics for a bit, so take a load off.
(He enters the portal and returns barely alive.)
Rodin: All done. He's a little rude, but he makes up for it with charm. Be nice to him. OK?
(Bayonetta has a new weapon her its disposal Onyx Roses. These are two girly shotguns.)
Chapter II: Vigrid, City of Deja Vu
(Exploring the level Bayonetta encounters Jeanne again. Now she rides a motorcycle.)Bayonetta: Fancy bumping into you here.
Jeanne: Out to find some answers about your past, are we?
Bayonetta: You've quite the familiar face. And using the same powers. But you'll have to forgive me, do we knew each other?
Jeanne: Same powers!? Don't make me laugh. I Your little dip in that lake has left you a bit rusty.
Bayonetta: I've been high and dry for 20 years now. The only rust on me is from the lack of any real challenge. Perhaps you're up for the task.
Jeanne: You‘ve already disappointed me.
(She steals Bayonetta’s necklace. Bayonetta is trying to take it away but without success.)
Jeanne: This is a moment I have long desired. But you've forgotten your destiny and wasted the past 20 years.
(She throws the necklace to Bayonetta.)
Bayonetta: You're right, I do seem to be having trouble remembering things of late. Would you be so kind as to take it from the top?
Jeanne: (adjusting makeup) Two overseers... The Eyes of the World. They are the power behind everything.
(Bayonetta recalls the past.)
Woman: Jeanne, as heir to the clan, the time has come for you to prove your right to fight under the Umbran name. You may select opponent of your choose.
Jeanne: Then allow me to face the outcast.
(She throws a dagger into the cage where we see Bayonetta.)
Woman: No! It is forbidden! The child is of impure blood. Challenging her would be a violation of our tenets of faith!
Jeanne: It would not be the first time we have faced each other.
Woman: What!?
Jeanne: (to Bayonetta) Will you face me in this hallowed arena?
Bayonetta: Well if I must, but I pray you've got a little something for me in return. You know. I‘m very fond of stuffed animals.
(They fight. Bayonetta wins and returns to her time. Now she has the ability to run on the walls.)
Bayonetta: Jeanne....
(Bayonetta goes to town. There we see a man fleeing from the soldiers. Seeing a beautiful woman, the man stops.)
Idiot: Fate brought us here together and it will never tear us apart.
Stupid Solder: Damn it!! I said stop! I'm authorized to use deadly force! Fuck! Where'd that bugger go!?
(The idiot manages to jump onto the balcony of one of the buildings and escape from the stupid soldier.)
Idiot: Sayonara! Fleur de Cirey, Eau du Parfum. Such a wonderful floral bouquet, with its subtle hints of Rosemary. You know, in the language of flowers, Rosemary equates to remembrance. Which doesn't quite equate to you, now does it, Bayonetta. Shit! Will you stop that!?
Bayonetta: That little bug on Enzo was a nice touch. Seeing you here, I suppose it wasn't the only one. You've certainly bloomed, haven't you my little Cheshire puss?
Idiot: I'm not your pet. The name is Luka. A name you better remember. Shit! Damn it! Wait! You can't just run away from me like that! I know what I saw that day!
(Flashback. We see a scuba diver opening the coffin of Bayonetta. Breaking free, she strangles the diver.)
Young Luka: FATHER!!
Luka: I know all about your kind. Sure, my colleagues laugh at me for chasing fairy tales, amongst other things, but I know they are real! I know the truth! This smell... It's the same smell that clung to the air the day my father was murdered. Which means I'm right on your doorstep, Bayonetta!
Bayonetta: I'll let you in on a little secret, Cheshire.
Luka: The name is Luka.
Bayonetta: You need to hone your sense of smell, my dear. There is no rosemary in the perfume. After all rosemary's a demon repellent.
(She kills all the angels.)
Luka: You only run away so fast because you've got something to run from... Me! But you can't escape me forever!
(Bayonetta visits The Gates of Hell.)
Rodin: Another LP? Heh... Workin me to the bone... But no need to ity me, I was bored anyways. Let me go whip some things into shape for ya. (he goes to hell and back) This took a bit to pound into shape, but the workmanship's solid. Now go put this thing to good use!
(He give Bayonetta a sword called [[w:c:bayonetta:修羅刃_-Shuraba-|修羅刃 -Shuraba-]] (The Sword of [[wikipedia:Asura_(Buddhism)|Asura]]))
(She visit some church in Vigrid.)
Bayonetta: Who's there? You've late enough hide and seek my scurrying little friend. Just a child? What are you doing running around Vigrid? You're certainly not dressed in your Sunday best.
(Bayonetta sees the girl's face and overwhelming by memories. She remembers sitting in a cage. When she comes to herself the girl are no longer there and a huge invisible monster bursts into the church.)
Angel Monster: The Eyes of the World... The two overseers... What once was held in the hands of the witch clan shall now be held in ours!
(Bayonetta defeats the monster.)
Chapter III: The Burning Ground
Angel Monster: Are you the one to have awakened me from my heavenly slumber, my world of light, and summoned me into this world of chaos? The taint of the dark world is upon you. Yet you have made but a pact with the darkness in exchange for the powers of a witch. It was said that one such pitiful creature survived of the annihilation. Tell me, my child. What is your name?Bayonetta: If I was your child, I'd be an awfully ugly witch, wouldn't I? Yours is a face only a mother could love, and one I could never forget. If only I could remember where from...
Angel Monster: Well then. My apologies. If you are not my awakener, than you and I have no quarrel.
(Bayonetta hits the monster with a stone.)
Bayonetta: No quarrel? You're in no position to decide that. See, my Infernal partners love my ability to eliminate your kind. I figured your sacrifice would shut them up for a while.
(Everything starts to crumble. Bayonetta escapes.)
(Bayonetta visits The Gates of Hell.)
Rodin: No matter how much you ask, I'm not puttin' a chainsaw on your arm. So what do you want?
(Bayonetta get that she needs and leave.)
Chapter IV: The Cardinal Virtue of Fortitude
Angel Monster: (to someone) You are most understood. Our fate is tied with the demon world, and we share your earnest interest in this matter. However, if she does not reach us alive, this conversation was all for not naught.Bayonetta: You again? And here I thought I'd see the last of you.
Angel Monster: It is most kind of you to alleviate my need to search you out, Bayonetta. Please forgive me my prior trespass lack of hospitality.
(We learn the name of the monster - Fortitudo.)
Bayonetta: I'm sure you will be more than hospitable to me this time around.
Fortitudo: I have been informed that a survivor of the witch hunts is resisting our domination. However, her inevitable reunion with hell makes her such a sad soul. If you are this pitiful being, then shall I release you from your torment.
(Bayonetta shoots him.)
Bayonetta: I'm sorry. I forgot to mention one of the reasons I hunt your kind. You are much too ugly not put out of your misery.
Fortitudo: Challenging us with the dark arts!? No matter the age, witches never learn...
(Bayonetta shoots him again.)
Bayonetta: Flock off, feather-face!
(Bayonetta defeats Fortitudo.)
Bayonetta: You know you're not nearly so ugly when you're screaming.
Fortitudo: It was as foretold... Your power... Incredible...
Bayonetta: Foretold!? Explain yourself!
Fortitudo: I, Fortitudo, am but a simple sacrifice for the resurrection of the Creator. May the Creator, Jubileus, grace you on your journey.
(He dies.)
Man's Voice: My dear, sweet child... Fear not, for I am watching over you... Continue on your path.
Chapter V: The Lost Holy Grounds
[Bayonetta lands at The Sunrise & Crescent Valley.]Bayonetta: Where the hell am I? I better have got frequent flyer miles for that flight.
[After some time, she notices a small oblong object on the ground.]
Bayonetta: Huh? My lipstick.
[He bends down to pick up her lipstick, and at that moment Luka tries to take a picture of her from the other world.]
Luka: Nothing! Damn...
[Stopping time, Bayonetta hums and draws him a cat whisker with her lipstick.]
Luka: What the--?
Bayonetta: I've often seen a girl without lipstick, but lipstick without a girl!? Most curious, isn't it Cheshire? What's also most curious is how a child like you has kept afloat in this town.
Luka: The… name… is… Luka! And don't you think it's a little strange to be worried about my well being? Sure, the festival of resurrection has peaked security. The thing only happens once every 500 years, can you blame them? Besides, when you look as good as I do, security isn't a problem. But a killer like you on the other hand… I'm sure you've found a way.
Bayonetta: (thinking) That little girl... I've seen her somewhere…
[She hears a voice coming from the depths of her consciousness...]
Voice: My dear, sweet child… She is the key to your future. To save yourself, you must also save the girl.
Luka: Hey, don't go freaking out on me. We both know you came here for something. But what you don't know is the closer you get, the harder it's gonna be for you to get away from me and what you've done. You'll have to fess up to it all! Ahh... I can't wait for you to get your hands on whatever it is you're after.
Bayonetta: Let me guess, you want a cut? Well, If you’re still alive by then, perhaps you can appeal to my generosity?
Luka: Still alive? You may be standing right in front of me, but you're definitely not living in reality. Which is a shame, because the truth is always going to be the truth. All I see when I look at you, the real you, is the truth. The truth is you killed my father. I don't care who believes me, they can't reject the truth. The truth will set me free from your black stain on my life. The truth will allow me to expose you to the world. Then I'll have won. And I'll do it without stooping to your level, because I'm not a heartless witch like you.
[Bayonetta adjusts her glasses and goes straight to Luka.]
Luka: Who, what are you going to do!? Kill me in plain sight? Go ahead. It would only prove everything I've said about you. Well, that, and sadden the hearts of a number of young ladies. Claire, and Trish, and Silvie, and Ammy… Oh, you don't want to piss her off let me tell you. Hell hath no fury!
[Bayonetta suddenly jumps onto Luka, hugging him in flight and landing on top of him when they land.]
Luka: What the...!?
[Part of the location collapses - Bayonetta saves Luka, after which she abruptly and mysteriously disappears.]
[Bayonetta climbs to the top of a tall building. A real storm is raging all around, and a powerful wind is blowing, knocking her off her feet. He notices a witch in red talking to Temperantia, one of the four Auditio of the Hierarchy of Laguna.]
Temperantia: What is the meaning of this? This is now not once, but twice. Explain this meddling in our affairs!
Jeanne: The only ones meddling are your hapless minions. This will be taken care of in the manner I see fit. Your assistance is not required.
[She notices Bayonetta.]
Jeanne: I suppose coming here has given you a second wind. Feeling better, Bayonetta?
Bayonetta: Who are you? And don't you dare say my long lost sister.
Jeanne: Sister!? You've quite the active imagination. You and I once fought for the jewels upon the crown of the Umbra throne. And now that you've returned, my sleeping beauty, it is time to finish that fight.
[Bayonetta remembers how Jeanne stabbed her a long time ago.]
Jeanne: No time for daydreaming.
[They start an epic battle, showing the highest mastery of their pistols, non-human dexterity and reaction speed. Their fight is interrupted by an earthquake. Bayonetta uses it to retreat.]
Jeanne: Those cretins fouled it all up again! But perhaps this can be to my advantage.
[She catches up with Bayonetta and continues fighting her, but loses.]
Jeanne: What's the matter, sweetie? Afraid of something, are you!?
Bayonetta: Afraid? Me?
Jeanne: This is a waste of my time. You're still not ready.
[She transforms into a red panther and quickly runs away, and then transforms into a bird and flies away. Surprised by such abilities, Bayonetta decides to try to repeat such a trick, and she succeeds.]
Bayonetta: Oh my... That was bloody amazing.
[She makes a powerful leap in panther form and flies over the full moon.]
Chapter VI:
The Gates of Paradise[Bayonetta arrives at Proving Ground Ruins. After a long battle, she arrives at the massive castle and kicks down the door. Several angels are doing something at the opposite door…]
Bayonetta: What are you boys doing in here? Are you hiding something from me? Come on…
[She turns her ass toward them as if beckoning them toward her, then shoots them with her pistols. She mocks the last survivor.]
Bayonetta: You've been cheating on me, haven't you? Someone else caught you eye?
[She beats him with the handle of her gun and throws him against the wall, throwing feathers everywhere. Afterwards, Bayonetta notices a crying girl who is in another world, making her look like a ghost.]
Bayonetta: Oh, dear. Something tells me I'm going to regret this.
[Bayonetta hears the voice again.]
Voice: My sweet, lovely child… She is the key to your future.
[Angels appear all around the girl. Bayonetta grabs the child and moves her into her world, covering her with a protective field.]
Bayonetta: I'm not normally one to play saviour, but I suppose I could make an exception and kill all you. Just this once, of course.
[Bayonetta keeps her promise and kills everyone. Afterward, she hears her own voice, melodiously singing "Fly to the Moon," as if from a thick fog. She wakes up lying on the floor.]
Girl: Mummy!
Bayonetta: Was I just singing?
Girl: Mummy!
Bayonetta: Whoa! Slow down, little one. I am not your mother.
Girl: But... Mummy!
Bayonetta: Will you quit calling me "Mummy"!
[The girl begins to cry. Bayonetta sighs and picks up the girl, pulling out her gun. She turns it over and raises the girl's chin with the handle.]
Bayonetta: If there's two things I hate in this world it's cockroaches and crying babies. Well, a crying baby cockroach would be truly terrible… So don't you dare cry.
Girl: Yes, Mummy.
Bayonetta: You've got to be a strong little one to survive in a place like this. What's your name, anyway?
Girl: Cereza.
Bayonetta: Cereza? You're not from Vigrid, are you little one? Where are you from?
Cereza: I'm from my house.
Bayonetta: Well now, I'll hazard a guess this isn't your home, so what on earth are you doing here?
Cereza: My Daddy told me to come here.
Bayonetta: And whereabouts is this “Daddy” of yours?
Cereza: He was at work, but now I don't know where he's gone. I want to go home!
[She grabs Bayonetta's leg.]
Bayonetta: I can't just drag you along wherever I go, little one. So you better not be getting attached to me.
Cereza: Yes, Mummy.
Bayonetta: (sighs) Come now little one. I'll help you out of here, but that's all.
[Cereza grabs Bayonetta by the long red strip of cloth sticking out of her hair.]
Bayonetta: And you have to promise there will be no crying. A single tear and you'll be crying alone. Got it?
Cereza: Okay, Mummy.
[Bayonetta sighs. Cereza cheerfully follows her. They enter the ruins of Vigrid, where Bayonetta has a chance to fight the giant angel, protecting Cereza at the same time. They enter a portal and travel to Paradiso. Cereza merrily runs away, but Bayonetta grabs her and lifts her into the air.]
Bayonetta: This is probably how you got lost to begin with.
[Suddenly the portal is blocked and several angels appear in front of Bayonetta.]
Cereza: Mummy…
Bayonetta: Don't worry, it's always scary the first time you see them. (to angels) So where was I? Oh yes. Your kind invitation. I do hope you've prepared desert as well.
[It kills them very quickly. Several angels in heavy armor and with shields appear.]
Bayonetta: Oh what a lovely tea party! And dancing, too! Cereza, my dear, watch and learn!
[After protecting Cereza with a force field, Bayonetta enters the battle, after which she goes to fight a huge angel blocking the passage with its mass. The battle, however, does not go according to plan. The angel grabs Cereza.]
Bayonetta: Little one!
Cereza: Mummy!
[Bayonetta fights the angel, after which her demonic costume turns into a dragon and devours him. Bayonetta catches Cereza falling from the angel's mouth. After Bayonetta notices... herself at the other end of the corridor. She is the one who caught Cereza while the real Bayonetta was fighting. Bayonetta runs to her through the laser barricades and, catching up to her, winks at Cereza, who immediately realizes that she is not in the hands of the real Bayonetta. She bites her hand and runs to the portal. The real Bayonetta stares at her reflection for a while, then falls into the fray. It turns out to be a shape-shifting angel. Having won, Bayonetta follows Cereza. She spots her and Luka on the bridge.]
Cereza: Mummy!
Luka: Mummy!? You're a mom? You!?
Bayonetta: Come now, Cheshire. Look at me. Do I look like I have any interest in children? Now making them. Well, that’s another story.
Luka: Whoa! Whoa! You're getting the wrong idea. I mean, it might be the right idea. But not right now right, right? Yeah... Uh... Speaking of right, I'm glad I've been standing around waiting for you, because I knew we’d cross paths. See, the only way to reach the upper crust and their gated island of champagne wishes and caviar dreams is over Prominence Bridge.
Bayonetta: Oh... Yes... The island… Lovely place, isn't it? Oh, now what!?
Luka: Don't play games with me! You've worked your magic on this poor defenseless child, haven't you!? You’re a sad, sick woman, you know that? I was her age when you killed my father. Wait... No... You couldn't… Oh my god, you did, didn't you? You killed her parents!
Bayonetta: Hmm... Come to think of it, she's better off with you. You two are more hassle than you're worth.
Luka: What!?
Bayonetta: Just keep a good eye on her, or you're gonna catch hell for it. No good deed goes unpunished, and you never know when a monster may sneak up on you.
[Ironically, several angels sneak up on her.]
Ceraza: Mummy! Look out!
[The angels attack and Bayonetta moves with them to another world.]
Luka: How in the--
[The bridge collapses and Luka uses a hook to leave it with Careza.]
Cereza: Mummy! No!
[Bayonetta looks after them from another world.]
Bayonetta: How can she see me!?
Chapter VII:
The Cardinal Virtue of Temperance[She goes out to the military base. There are several hangars for planes and other equipment. A real hurricane is blowing through the air, lifting cars into the air. Bayonetta doesn't even pretend to dodge it all. She go straight to the eye of the storm.]
Temperantia: (translated) Ahh, the lovely Bayonetta. Such beautiful eyes… Despite the passing of time, you still hold the pride of an overseer don’t you?
Bayonetta: I feel like a fucking celebrity in this town!
[A bus falls on her, which makes Temperantia laugh. However... we see Bayonetta floating on a piece of rock, spinning around the high angel.]
Bayonetta: See that!? Everyone rushes at me like crazed fans. They still haven't figured out that I don't give autographs!
Temperantia: (translated) Long before this universe came to be, the first Armageddon split reality into light, dark, and chaos. It was in this battle that those who rebelled against the light claimed dominion over the darkness. We have but one goal: resurrecting the Creator and reunifying the Trinity of Realities. We have but one goal: resurrecting the Creator and reunifying the Trinity of Realities. That shall be the purpose of your sacrifice!
Bayonetta: I'm not much for the talkative types. How about we have a little fun instead. You did plan on having fun with me, right? There will be plenty of time for pillow talk afterwards.
[The epic battle begins! Bayonetta breaks the angel to pieces, stopping the storm. Noticing the wolf-angel trying to sneak away quietly, she steps on his tail.]
Bayonetta: All done? Well, let me give you back your toy then!
[She spins the angel wolf over her head and throws it at Temperantia. The angel wolf crashes into a fuel truck on the fly, which nails Temperantia to the ground. Bayonetta drives a statue of a peeing angel into the fuel truck, which now pisses gasoline on Temperantia's face.]
Temperantia: (translated) He was right! So wonderfully right! Your eyes…
[Bayonetta ignites a trickle of gasoline flowing from Temperantia with her heel and strikes an epic pose not to look back at the explosion, but the fire is extinguished. Inhaling, Bayonetta shoots right into the pissing angel's dick and Temperantia explodes in laughs. Hands take him straight to, er...hell?]
Temperantia: (translated) May the Creator, Jubileus, grace you!
[Then Bayonetta suddenly remembers that she forgot to talk to him about her past.]
Bayonetta: Bugger. And I didn't make any time for pillow talk.
[She leaves. Jeanne, standing nearby, watched in silence...]
Chapter VIII:
Route 666[Bayonetta walks along the Vigrid Highway.]
Bayonetta: The bridge in these heels? I don't suppose I can call a cab to get me to the island.
Military: Look alive people! We have an unidentified vehicle approaching. Close the gate!
[Bayonetta notices an APC traveling at high speed, driven by Luka with Cereza in the passenger seat. Bayonetta runs after the APC, jumping over the cars. She transforms into a panther and runs at the last split second through the closing gate. Reaching for her pistols, she shoots a heart-shaped hole in the gate, through which Luka's APC leaps.]
Luka: Woohoo! Did you see that!? I told you there was nothing to worry about!
Cereza: Mummy! Mummy saved us!
Luka: What!?
[Bayonetta opens the hatch.]
Bayonetta: Hello there, Cheshire.
Luka: Shit!
Cereza: Mummy!
Bayonetta: It seems your driving is on par with your journalism.
Luka: I figured I'd beat you to the island! But the guards had another idea, didn't they? Not really my best plan, huh?
Bayonetta: You think you've got me figured out, don't you?
Luka: We journalists have to have some detective skills, you know? You're after a gem stone. And that stone has to be in the Ithavoll Group Building. I'm headed there too.
Bayonetta: How odd. You seem to know where I'm going before I do. Yet you don't seem to know how to drive a car in a straight line.
Luka: What am I, a chauffeur!?
Bayonetta: Do you have any idea what prolonged walking in this salty air will do to my hair?
Luka: Well, I tend to use some product when I go to the beach.
[Explosions can be heard outside. They begin to be pursued by the military.]
Bayonetta: Little one! Get down! Put your foot down, Cheshire. I'll take care of our pest problem.
Luka: (sighs) Wonderful.
[There are angels on the roofs of military APCs.]
Bayonetta: I'm getting the distinct impression I'm not wanted on that island!? But love it when people play hard to get!
[She starts fighting angels on the roofs of cars, after which she finds herself a motorcycle, which she winds up with her middle finger.]
Bayonetta: Time to go vroom!
[After a frantic chase on a motorcycle, Bayonetta jumps on top of Luka's APC. However... The road in front is destroyed.]
Luka: Holy crap! For fuck's sake, that's overdoing it!
Bayonetta: Right! Turn Right! Get off the road!
[She stops time and jumps off the APC to several large angels named Braves.]
Bayonetta: I know you do want me here, but you really could have been more subtle about it.
[Bayonetta defeats them and breaks her spell. The bridge collapses, but she manages to teleport the APC through the angelic portal.]
Chapter IX:
Paradiso - A Remembrance of Time[Bayonetta enters an abstract world of flying pieces of buildings in the air. Everything is flooded with a bright golden light and angelic singing is coming from somewhere.]
Bayonetta: Jesus. This is...
Voice: My dear, sweet child… Fear not, for I am watching over you…
[Bayonetta makes her way through the angelic city, battling crowds of various angelic monsters, even ships flying through the air. At the end she has to fight a huge ball transforming into various objects.]
Chapter X:
Paradiso - A Sea of Stars[Bayonetta enters the very castle in which she was once imprisoned. She touches the walls with the palm of her hand as she walks down the long corridor. Touching old stains on the wall, she plunges into memories...]
Woman’s Voice: You may select opponents of your choice.
Bayonetta: Vigrid... I've been there before.
[She remembers again how Jeanne stabbed her with her dagger. She picks up from the floor a statue of two girls carved out of stone. Two names are written on the bottom.]
Bayonetta: Jeanne? Cereza? The little one?
[She will remember her imprisonment again. At that moment, the stems of a giant plant burst out from under the floor and grab Bayonetta's leg. She manages to shoot off the stem and the plant crawls away. Bayonetta squeamishly shakes off the leg with a piece of the stem left on it.]
Bayonetta: Tentacles... Why did it have to be tentacles?
[Bayonetta again has to go through practically the same town but with many differences. When she climbs to the top of the castle where a treacherous challenge awaits her, we switch to Luka and Cereza. They are walking in the woods.]
Cereza: What happened to Mummy?
Luka: Well, you see, she just went look for something, that's all. (to himself) I can't believe that witch. Placing a poor helpless child under her spell. If she did anything to this little girl's parents. I swear…
[Cereza falls suddenly.]
Cereza: (in tears) Mummy.
Luka: No need to cry... We'll get you to your mom in no time. Here, I've got some candy if you want.
Cereza: Mmm... What is this? It's yummy.
Luka: I don't know... It's candy Strawberry, I think?
Cereza: Hey kitty, I've got some yummies. Would you like some?
Luka: Is that cat your friend?
Cereza: Yes, this name is Cheshire. He's cute, isn't he?
Luka: Cheshire… What a stupid name. Well, so much for taking the highway… That just means we're just gonna have to find something else. Now all I have to figure out is what to do about you. So, Cerezita. That woman's really your mom?
Cereza: Uh-huh! My Mummy is strong and she protects me from scary monsters!
Luka: Monsters? I don't think you know who the real monsters are.
[Suddenly, the ground shook and some noise was heard. The screen fades. Bayonetta continues her journey and eventually encounters and defeats two flying Inspired dragons.]
Chapter XI:
The Cardinal Virtue of Justice[We go back to Luka and Cereza. They are at a loss as to what is going on.]
Cereza: Mummy! Help!
Luka: Don't panic! I'm here. There's no need to worry about a thing!
[One of the trees falls and Luka covers Cereza. Cereza looks out from behind the fallen tree and sees something in a cloud of dust.]
Cereza: Get them, Mummy! Get them!
Luka: Mommy?
Careza: Can't you see? Mummy's fighting the bad monsters for us. Mister, if you don't open your eyes you'll miss everything! Look with these.
[She gives him her glasses, touches them beforehand. Luka sees Bayonetta fighting the angels and falls on his ass, taking off the glasses. He recalls the fateful day when his father died.]
Young Luka: FATHER!!
Luka: Shit.
[He puts on the glasses again and grabs Cereza, trying to escape with her, but the angels surround him. Bayonetta kills the angels, followed by an earthquake that destroys the ground beneath their feet.]
Luka: OH NO!
[Bayonetta and Luka fall into a military base, and Bayonetta is immediately attacked by a giant plant she has encountered before.]
Luka: What the hell is that thing?
Cereza: Mummy!
Luka: Cerezita, this is way too dangerous!
[Cereza runs to her mother dodging stems. Luka runs after her and grabs her, but Cereza drops her stuffed cat. The plant tears off the cat's eye-button.]
Cereza: Cheshire!
[Bayonetta catches the toy cat. Luka escapes from the dangerous place with Cereza.]
Bayonetta: Well, kitty, what do you think we should do? He’s hurt you, has he? Well, we can't be having that now can we!?
[A huge angel Justitia, one of the four Auditio of the Hierarchy of Laguna. This creature has four faces with stems sticking out of it, emerging from under the ground. Bayonetta throws out the cat toy and prepares to fight.]
Bayonetta: Let's rock, baby!
[It turns the angel into a bloody meatball.]
Bayonetta: How about how, kitty? Still not enough you say? (to Justitia) You can go another round, can't you?
Justitia: (translated) It was as the Lumen Sage foretold. Your power is indeed magnificent.
Bayonetta: The Lumen Sage?
Justitia: (translated) Long have two eyes, one light and one dark, watched over the world and its history. It is this power that will allow the creator to start a new cycle of creation. Bayonetta, may Jubileus, the Creator, grace you!
[A portal appears from which arms are stretched out to take Justitia to hell.]
Bayonetta: Now where are my new best friends? I suppose one of them is an adult, so they should be ok.
Chapter XII:
The Broken Sky[Meanwhile, Luka and Cereza are hiding nearby.]
Cereza: Excuse me, sir, may I have my glasses back?
Luka: Huh? Oh... Yeah… Here you go. Cereza, how did you get such... Magical glasses?
Cereza: The glasses aren't magic, silly. I can see the monsters without them!
Luka: Monsters... Not quite. So, uh, has Bayonetta, I mean your mom, been fighting these big bad monsters for a long time?
Cereza: Mummy is a witch, and witches protect people and are very strong. When I grow up, I'll be strong too and I'll protect my mummy!
Luka: Wait... You think witches do what!? Aww, forget it. No point in arguing with a little kid. I'll manage on my own.
Bayonetta: I'm sure you will.
[In a sudden moment of surprise, Luka falls and hits his head on a rusty pipe.]
Cereza: Mummy!
Luka: Shit!
Bayonetta: You never cease to amuse me, Cheshire. I suppose that's your next target? This is yours, little one. You didn't cry while I was gone, did you?
Cereza: Nope.
Bayonetta: Good.
Luka: Bayonetta... No matter how I ask, no matter how many times, you always say the same thing.
Bayonetta: Come now, kitty Yoshow It was all ju--
Luka: --a misunderstanding. You're so stubborn, you know that!? My father... He was a journalist, too. In fact, he was twice the man I could ever hope to be. He was obsessed with one case his entire career. A case so bizarre it took over his life. They could have made a movie of the details: The followers of darkness, the Umbra Witches, and their light world counterparts, the Lumen Sages, controlling everything with a power known as "The Eyes of the World." Then, the light and dark was suddenly disappeared from their medieval home in Europe. You may be familiar with the town. You're standing in it. Welcome to Vigrid, 500 years later.
Bayonetta: 500 years.
[Bayonetta again recalls the castle in which she was imprisoned, and Luka's voice echoes in the background of her memories.]
Luka: Each clan, working at the behest of the powers that be, sought to lead their fractured world towards peace. They both possessed an “Eye,” said to have the power to create history, that they used to oversee the world. However, their spirit of cooperation did not last, for amongst them, a pair of young star-crossed lovers conceived a child that sent the clans on a path to ruin. The woman was thrown in jail, and the man exiled from his clan. However, the child remained with the Umbra, raised as a black sheep, even amongst the darkness. Since the balance between light and dark had been lost, both clans spiraled into decay. Legend had it that the two "Eyes" could be united to control reality itself, and this legend fueled ambition and desire, leading to a myriad of battles between the clans. In fact, it led to their mutual destruction.
[The memory ends.]
Luka: My father was mocked for buying such a fairy tale; however, I believed his story. And I believe it more than ever now that I've found you.
[Bayonetta remembers the diver who found her coffin and opens it. As she breaks free, Bayonetta kills him, while little Luka watches.]
Luka: The memory of the clan ligers on, despite the passing of 500 years. What on earth was my father searching for? And why did he have to die for it? I have to discover the truth with my own eyes. That's why I haven't given up my chase for it. Or you. The head of the Ithavoll Group, the multi-national that dominates Vigrid, recently tried to sell an enormous gemstone on the black market. If he isn’t selling out in the pen it means we're going to have acquire it by other means. And that starts by sneaking on to that jet.
[He leaves. Cereza merrily runs up to Bayonetta and begins to copy her.]
Cereza: Mummy, are you looking for something?
Bayonetta: I am.
Cereza: How did you lose it?
Bayonetta: Little one, do you have anything you really like? Something really important to you?
[She digs in her pocket and pulls out a crescent-shaped medallion.]
Cereza: Yes! This! I love it.
[Bayonetta takes the medallion in her hands and remembers holding it out to Cereza through the bars of her cage.]
Bayonetta: Where did you get this?
Cereza: You gave it to me, mummy. For my birthday!
Bayonetta: When you love something, never lose it. Understand, little one?
[He takes one of the red ribbons out of his hair and ties it to the medallion.]
Bayonetta: You must keep it safe, close to your heart.
[She puts the medallion on Cereza and she runs off merrily playing with it. At that moment something bursts out of the ground and a car flies at Cereza. Suddenly Luka, using the Spider-Man gimmick, grabs her and carries her to the top of the jet.]
{By the way, the actor who voices Luka, Yuri Lowenthal, will be voicing Peter Parker in Marvel's Spider-Man in ten years!}
Bayonetta: Little one!
[Cereza slips out of Luka's hands and falls into the jet's vent.]
Luka: Cereza! Damn.
[Jet begins to take off. Luka falls off it, but the much more nimble Bayonetta jumps on the jet and stays on it. Luka is left to watch the Jet fly away.]
Luka: Shit!
[Bayonetta makes her way through the decks of the Valkyrie, aboard which she finds herself. She fights many strong angels and finally comes out, where she hears a familiar voice.]
Jeanne: Back to your old self, are we? Why so glum? Something troubling you?
Bayonetta: Only your constant fretting over my state of affairs. I've no time to play games with you.
Jeanne: No need to take out your stress on me, Bayonetta. It's clear you're worried for the girl.
[Instantly reacting to Jeanne's words, she leaps toward her and attacks with her long legs. They fight epically and after a while stand against each other, pointing their pistols.]
Bayonetta: Tell me where she is. Now.
Jeanne: My, aren't we attached to our precious little one? Do you like when she calls you “Mummy”?
Bayonetta: You're absolutely delusional. If I leave her, he'll never shut up about it. And his whining is twice as irritating as anything the child could muster.
Jeanne: (laughs) You've quite the tongue when it comes to curling round the truth.
Bayonetta: And what about you? What are you hiding? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think these might mean something to you.
[She throws at Jeanne's feet the very statue she found next to her dungeon. Jeanne throws it away.]
Jeanne: I've no need for worthless junk.
[A rumbling sound is heard from afar. Jeanne and Bayanetta turn around, pointing their pistols in the direction from which the rumbling sound came. A giant angel appears from the clouds.]
Huge Angel: (translated) Why must you needlessly stumble and stall? Have you forgotten the task with which you have been charged? Make haste, for the era of the Creator approaches!
Jeanne: I am well aware of my task! But you have forgotten that I do not need your help!
[She shoots at the angel and bangs his head on the flying plane. Angel tries to counterattack with a fireball, but misses and hits the wing of the plane.]
Jeanne: It seems your little friend is gone forever.
[She shoots Bayonetta, but she dodges the shots, gathers all the bullets in a pile and turns them into a small spear that she throws at Jeanne. As Jeanne dodges, Bayonetta flies up to her.]
Jeanne: Fill them! Fill your eyes with hatred. Accept your violent fate! Accept it and earn the Left Eye! Prove you deserve it!
Voice: Fear not my child, for no harm will come to you. I'm always watching over you... My dear, sweet child.
[Bayonetta confronts Jeanne and defeats her. She remembers that Cereza was left on the plane!]
Bayonetta: Cereza!
[She runs inside the plane.]
Jeanne: Not yet. She isn't ready.
[Bayonetta, meanwhile, runs through the crumbling plane in search of little Cereza.]
Bayonetta: Little one! Where are you!? Little one! Can you hear me!?
[Cereza is hiding behind a stack of boxes. She is all in tears.]
Cereza: Mummy! Mummy! Mummy!
Bayonetta: Cereza!
Careza: Mummy! I was so scared.
Bayonetta: No crying now, little one. You know the rules - No cockroaches or crying babies. Time to go, little one. Hold on tight, OK?
Careza: Okay.
[Bayonetta takes the little girl with her. And she has to fight the angels and keep her safe! In the end, the plane falls into the ocean.]
Chapter XIII:
The Cardinal Virtue of Prudence[Bayonetta and Cereza are standing on the wing of a plane in the middle of the ocean. Luka arrives in a helicopter and jumps onto the wing.]
Luka: Let's go!
[Bayonetta notices a huge angel in the ocean and gives Cereza to Luka.]
Careza: Mummy! Mummy!
Bayonetta: It's OK, little one. I'll be right back.
[She pulls out her guns. Luka climbs up on a rope to the helicopter with Cereza in his hands.]
Careza: Mummy! Mummy!
Huge Angel: (translated) The woman fled so swiftly. I am reminded why we have come to rely upon the unreliable nature of humanity.
[It is Sapientia, one of the four Auditio of the Hierarchy of Laguna.]
Sapientia: (translated) A valuable lesson, but not my purpose. I have come to evaluate you and denomine whether you are worthy of your role in the resurrection of the Creator, Jubileus.
[Bayonetta tosses a lamppost into his giant mouth, blocking it.]
Bayonetta: Another talkative type. I don't think I've got time to entertain your blather. I'd much rather hear it straight from your boss.
Sapientia: (translated) You speak of our boss!? The resurrection 500 years ago fell victim to his human ineptitude, and we were unable to revive the Creator. However, I must thank the Sage for his witch hunts. His impetus eradicated a vile clan from this Earth.
Bayonetta: The witch hunts?
Sapientia: (translated) Thanks to his efforts, this town has become a source of strength and we've gained a foothold strong enough to orchestrate the Creator's resurrection. All that remains is awakening the Left Eye, and uniting the Eyes of the World. Then the new era of creation shall arrive!
[He attacks Bayonetta with his clawed paw and breaks the wing of the plane she was standing on. Bayonetta uses the wreckage as a surfboard and, surfing around the giant, fights it. She breaks his legs and summons a giant demonic spider, who weaves a web in a whirlpool and catches the giant in it.]
Bayonetta: I have no idea why you would want this stone, it would look absolutely terrible on you. Much too flashy.
Sapientia: (translated) Stone? You think this is all about some worthless rock! (laughs) May Jubileus, the Creator, grace you! (laughs)
[They take him to hell. Bayonetta jumps up on the wreckage to the helicopter, starting time again and ending up in it even before Luka does!]
Bayonetta: Welcome aboard, Cheshire.
Luka: (almist fell out) Oh, fucking hell!
Careza: Mummy!
Bayonetta: I told you I'd be right back. (to Luka) Shouldn't you be, you know, flying this thing? I'm a bit occupied at the moment.
Luka: Well, so much for the subtle approach. We might as well have speakers on this thing blaring Ride of the fucking Valkyries.
Bayonetta: Come now. We're VIPs. You know, nothing says you've made it in life like a private helicopter.
Luka: Then welcome aboard Air Luka Flight 001. This is your captain, LUKA, speaking. Fasten your safety belts as this may be a bumpy flight.
[They fly toward the island in the center of which rises an ominous-looking tower.]
Chapter XIV:
Isla Del SolLuka: You're really not going to like what comes next. I hope you know that.
Bayonetta: Don't tell me. Air Cheshire has awful in-flight entertainment and horrendous food?
Luka: Think about it. Those things that downed the jet aren't just going to let us land on their island. You think we can just say “Hey, we're here!” and they'll bring us a cake? Things look good up from up here. But the further down you go the harder it is to not notice the reality... of things.
[He concentrates his gaze on Bayonetta's breasts.]
Bayonetta: Cheshire. Look.
Luka: Oh... I'm lookin'.
[He finally looks away and turns his gaze to notice two missiles flying at them.]
Luka: Oh, fuck me!
[The missile hits the helicopter and it explodes, but it does not kill the heroes - they are already flying on the missile itself, which is a phallic symbol.]
Bayonetta: Welcome to my fantasy zone. Get ready!
[The game turns into a bullet hell, where we are invited to control the missile.]
Cereza: It's brilliant, mummy!
[Bayonetta, extremely pleased with herself, flies into town on the missile. However... Next to her, flying in the opposite direction, Jeanne flies on a missile! They begin to fight.]
Jeanne: Welcome to Isla del Sol, island of wealth and power!
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
Jeanne: If you've made it this far, that should be enough! You're back to your old self. This is where we finish what was started so long ago.
[She presses a button and fires several missiles.]
Bayonetta: A friend of my enemy is also my enemy. Be it Witch or Sage.
Jeanne: The Lumen Sage They were our counterbalance as overseers. Between us here was a law that was never to be broken. It stated that “The intersection of light and dark would bring calamity to this earth.”
[She launches more missiles.]
Jeanne: But 500 years ago, a child was born in clear violation of this tenet. That child was you.
Bayonetta: 500 years ago.
Jeanne: The disaster this cal sed sentit clans into a spiral of chaos that continues to be felt to this day. You, the half-breed of light and dark, are center of that chaos. Allowing you to continue to exist is a danger that cannot be accepted.
[Bayonetta recalls again the day Jeanne stabbed her with the dagger.]
Jeanne: (in the past) When the Eyes of the World are within our grasp, the power of creation will be awakened. This is why the Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another!
Jeanne: The Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another. Bayonetta, it is time that this is brought to an end. That you are brought to an end
Bayonetta: You... You did it.
Jeanne: It is our charge as witches to protect the treasures of the clan… By any means necessary. Even if it means burning every inch of this island to a crisp.
[At that moment Luka flies over her in a truck. He uses his hook to take the detonator from Jeanne's hands.]
Luka: I'm really beginning to hate missiles. You know, I have no idea what the hell you girls got going on here, but you don't mind if I take this off your hands, do ya? Get in, Cerezita.
[They leave in a truck. Jeanne tries to catch up with them, but Bayonetta stops her.]
Cereza: Mummy… Mummy!
[Luka truck runs into a wall and explodes!]
Bayonetta: Cheshire! Cereza...
Jeanne: Bayonetta. Time is of the essence. This can wait no longer!
[They fight epically on the roof of a building, on a rocket, and even on a steep wall. Jeanne even changes into a white suit, but it doesn't help her and she loses anyway.]
Bayonetta: Now it's decided.
Jeanne: So it is. The fear is still not gone from your eyes...
Bayonetta: Fear?
Jeanne: The memories you've held for 500 years are the source of your fear. They cloud your vision. But now you’ve accepted your fate. That is how you bested me. That is why you possess the most beloved of Umbran treasures. That is why you possess the Left Eye.
Bayonetta: We fought for this stone… And because of it everyone died.
[She takes a red stone out of her locket on her chest. Jeanne takes it and looks at it.]
Jeanne: That gem brings back so many memories...
[The inscriptions that have appeared from the stone awaken memories in Bayonetta again.]
Jeanne: (in the past) That is why the Left Eye, our treasured Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! I will not stand for the wild ambition of a treacherous Lumen Sage who disrupted our age old balance. Your path ends here!
[She shoots the masked Bayonetta and turns her into a red gemstone.]
Jeanne: (in the past) Do not fear your fate. Stand... Cereza.
Jeanne: In the innocence of our childhood we used to play together as friends. But as time passed, perhaps even my eyes were clouded with fear.
Bayonetta: We were...?
Jeanne: Do not fear your fate. Stand, Cereza. Stand and open your eyes. For with every truth, there is another one to be seen.
[She pulls out her gun and shoots, but Bayonetta dodges. At this point several missiles fly into the building and Bayonetta is thrown into the next building.]
Bayonetta: Jeanne.
[The elevator doors open and out comes Luka with Cereza in his arms. Bayonetta grasps.]
Lika: Is it over!? What!? It's me like you don't scare the shit out of me all the time!?
Bayonetta: Cereza! I don't know whether to shoot you or take you to Vegas for good luck, Cheshire.
Luka: Give me more credit than that If you must know… Where L.U.K.A. Luka is concerned, there's no such thing as luck. Only skill. You didn't expect me to trust bitches… I mean witches, did you, Bayonetta!?
Bayonetta: How's the little one?
Luka: Out like a light, but OK other than that. What about you? You really think I'm gonna let myself be seen in public with a girl looking all beat up like that?
[He gives her a candy.]
Bayonetta: I look dreadful, do I? You'll have to learn to wipe that stupid look off your face or I'll never let you keep chasing me around this world. Got that? Luka.
Luka: (laughs) Now that's more like it.
Chapter XV:
A Tower of Truth[Bayonetta and Luka, with Cereza in his arms, approach the tall golden doors that are the entrance to the tower. Cereza wakes up.]
Bayonetta: Welcome back, little one.
Cereza: Mummy... Where are we?
Luka: It looks like someone's expecting us. Awfully nice of them to roll out the red carpet.
Bayonetta: Luka, you need to get one thing straight--
Luka: Yeah. I know. "I won't look after you, so don't screw up." I got things under control.
Bayonetta: Let's go. Stay next to me, little one.
Voice: Rise my child! Rise to realize your true potential! Unleash your power and awaken the Eyes of the World!
Cereza: Daddy...!?
Bayonetta: What?
Cereza: Daddy! It's Daddy!
Bayonetta: Daddy?
Cereza: Of course, Mummy! Can't you hear him? OK, Daddy. I'm coming… And I'll bring Mummy with me.
[She runs into the tower.]
Bayonetta: Little one, wait!
Cereza: This way, Mummy!
Bayonetta: Little one!
[She runs after the girl. The doors of the tower close.]
Luka: Cerezita!? Bayonetta!? Damn it.
[He has to find another way in. Bayonetta, on the other hand, climbs the Ithvoll Building stairs in her usual way - killing crowds of angels. Having climbed to the top and once again fought all the same bosses, Bayonetta passes through the road of light and enters a spherical portal.]
Chapter XVI:
The Lumen Sage[Bayonetta enters a vast auditorium, with a giant round window at the far end. Behind the pulpit in a high chair sits a man with a queer voice. On his lap sits Cereza.]
Sage: What follows those living in the light is nothing but the profound, empty darkness born from the shadow that longer as they approach the brilliant radiance. To truly see your eyes must be open to both light and dark. Don't you agree, my dear child?
[Bayonetta enters through the portal.]
Cereza: Mummy's here! Mummy's here! Mummy!
Bayonetta: Little one...
Sage: You've arrived… My dear, sweet Cereza. My, my... Why the grim face, my dear. As a child, your smile was warmer than the sun.
Bayonetta: So, you are the last of the Lumen Sages.
Sage: I am indeed. My name is Balder. But if you so choose, you may address me as Father. There is much you have forgotten. It has been 500 years since we last met. If your memories were still intact, this would have been a much more emotional reconciliation.
Bayonetta: How did you get the girl?
Balder The Sage: Where shall I begin? We, the Lumen Sages, and your Umbra Witches, as long become the overseers of history, each bearing witness with their own "eye." This is how our universe's existence was preserved. However, for 500 years, you have been exiled from the world's affairs. You are the Left Eye of the Eyes of the World.
Bayonetta: Could you dispense with the rides and just tell me what these sodding Eyes actually are!
Balder The Sage: Your years of slumber have caused you to forget many things, even as we stand on the verge of the resurrection of the Creator… The resurrection of Jubileus. There is but one way to return your epoch of forgotten memories and open your eye of the overseer. Your uncorrupted eye had to be exposed to the history it could not see. Ah… Your battles… Your struggles… Everything you've experienced in this town has been a stepping stone to your enlightenment. It has all been done for the Left Eye.
[Bayonetta pulls out her gun.]
Bayonetta: I've had enough of your philosophical pretensions. I won't ask again. Where did you get the girl?
Balder The Sage: Your question has been answered. All this has been done to awaken the Left Eye. For that, you had to see yourself once more.
Bayonetta: You are truly beyond salvation, Sage.
Balder The Sage: Ahh... Salvation. Such a curious word. I marked the path to salvation with light. However, no matter how brilliant that light grows, the darkness within the human heart grows even darker. Light, Dark, and Chaos between… Three realities once split shall be brought together to create a new universe in the image of the old. To these ends, leading to the Festival of Resurrection 500 years ago. I fanned the flames of terror spurring on the witch hunts. However, despite the people belief in the return of Jubileus, the Creator, the Left Eye was out of reach. Since then, I have devoted myself to this town's prosperity and now it is time for my preparations to bear fruit. Jubileus will be resurrected, we will become the Eyes of the World, and a new universe will take hold!
[Bayonetta recalls the events of 500 years ago. She is holding her dead mother in her arms.]
Masked Bayonetta: Mummy!
Bayonetta: I could never call the man behind this nightmare "Father"!
Luka: (clapping) Great speech, big guy.
Bayonetta: Luka.
Luka: Getting a bit ahead of ourselves, aren't we Mr. Big Shot Ithavoll Executive? Salvation, light… You take this entrepreneurial philosophy a bit seriously, don't ya? But it's all diarrhea of the mouth, if you ask me. History is littered with famous genocidal figures just like you… Or should I say infamous genocidal figures.
Balder The Sage: You must be Luka, journalist extraordinaire. I must say, I'm truly impressed you've made it this far, child. Like father, like son, I suppose.
Luka: What?
Balder The Sage: Luka, Luka, Luka… Your father had problems with my philosophies. It's fine to investigate, but when malicious rumors start to spread I must see to it that they come to a stop. For being kind enough to ascertain that my long lost Cereza was at the bottom of some lake, I granted him his final wish, and accepted his permanent resignation.
Luka: You bastard!
[Angels fly up to him and grab his arms and legs, lifting Luka into the air.]
Young Like: FATHER!!
Balder The Sage: You are of no use to me; however, I am not without dignity. I will allow you to die in the same manner as your father.
[He snaps his fingers. The angels start pulling him in different directions, but Bayonetta kills them with the gun. Balder grabs Luka with telekinesis and, breaking several walls with his body, throws him out the window. Bayonetta doesn't have time to catch up with him.]
Bayonetta: Luka!!
Balder The Sage: Well, I guess my plan has gone right out the window. (smirks) Such a shame that sacrificed to be made. But if destiny is not fulfilled soon, this tragedy will be repeated ad nauseam. Speaking of tragedy, I suppose you've met Jeanne? Well, she sealed you away and kept you from trouble after falling into our hands, she's been incredibly useful. Although her distinct lack of obedience required a bit of mental… reprogramming. Her tragic end led you directly to me, just as planned. The time for awakening the Left Eye is soon. Fear not, my dear sweet Cereza.
[Bayonetta shoots him, but Balder stops time and redirects the bullets, then grabs Bayonetta by the throat.]
Balder The Sage: That is it, Cereza. Do not fear your fate. Stand tall, my child. Realize your true potential!
[He tosses Bayonetta aside and lifts Cereza into the air with telekinesis.]
Balder The Sage: Cereza, we are one, my child.
[He absorbs Cereza turning into a peacock angel. Cereza's head protrudes from his chest. The top of the tower explodes, and Bayonetta flies into the abyss on the wreckage. Father Balder flies up to her. Time stands still and they begin to fight! Bayonetta finds a way to overpower the unstoppable Sage and loads her lipstick into her gun.]
Bayonetta: Don't fuck with a witch!
[She shoots her lipstick right into Balder's head!]
Father Balder: May Jubileus, The Creator, grace you!
[His corpse falls into his own ruined auditorium. Bayonetta snaps her finger and a missile flies into the auditorium with Luka clinging to her decorative ornament. He falls to the ruins and shakes himself off.]
Luka: I've got to give you credit, Bayonetta. You never cease to impress.
Bayonetta: You haven't seen the half of it.
Luka: Oh, I've seen enough… Well, that about wraps it up, huh?
Bayonetta: Not yet.
[Bayonetta uses her Left Eye on the round window of the auditorium and goes back in time. She puts Cereza to sleep.]
Cereza: Mummy... Daddy...
Bayonetta: No need to be afraid, little one. The nightmare is over. Everything was just a dream. You're a strong little girl. There is nothing you cannot overcome.
Cereza: Mummy… Did you find it? What you were looking for?
Bayonetta: Yes, I found it. So don't you worry anymore. You just keep your treasure safe too. Sweet dreams, little one.
[She sings “Fly to the Moon”. The circular window of the auditorium cracks and we return to the present. Bayonetta is in pain and begins to emit a red glow. She recalls events both distant and recent.]
Bayonetta: When you love something, never lose it. Understand, little one? You must keep it safe, close to your heart.
Masked Bayonetta: I'm not afraid anymore, Mummy. No matter what… There's nothing I cannot do.
Luka: Bayonetta! What's happening to you!?
[He tries to touch her, but gets electrocuted.]
Father Balder: And now it is done. The Right Eye oversees the light, the Left Eye oversees the darkness. Two eyes to oversee the world. It was never the woman known as "Bayonetta" that I set my sights upon. It was you as a child, Cereza, that I sought. For she was the one who saw the ward through innocent eyes, and she was the one who give rise to a new history. It was her energy that could awaken the Left Eye. This was all worked out splendidly. Let us begin, Cereza. The time is at hand.
[He ascends with Bayonetta to the top of the tower.]
Father Balder: Now the resurrection of Jubileus shall be completed. We are the eyes, overseeing the world. We are the eyes over seeing a new era… A new reality… To which we will devote ourselves eternally.
[He flies up to the giant statue of the woman and enters her forehead. The statue opens its eye. In her left, blue eye we see Father Balder, and in her right, red eye we see Bayonetta.]
Father Balder: May Jubileus the Creator, grace all of its creations!
Epilogue:
Requiem[The tower turns into a rocket... the adepts of the cult watch it with bated breath... Suddenly a motorcycle appears! Jeanne rushes to the rescue!]
Jeanne: Thank god. There's still time…
[We see that she saves herself from the explosion with a red gemstone, which in addition broke Balder's mental control. She jumps on the monocycle to the rocket.]
Jeanne: The Left Eye, our treasure Left Eye, will never fall into the hands of another! It is the pride of the Umbra Witches!
[She rides at breakneck speed through the tower itself.]
Father Balder: Ahh… Jeanne. You've provided me with many blessings. The one and only, authentic Left Eye. Merely seeing it muss jealousy within you. Your body must yearn to feel a new universe form around it.
Jeanne: I have no intentions of gazing upon the Left Eye. I am here to reclaim my Umbran sister!
[Balder concentrates energy and destroys an entire asteroid, causing a stream of firestones to fall on Jeanne. She dodges it and gets to the head of the statue.]
Father Balder: The time has come for Jubeleus to return! At last, the Trinity of Realities will know their real ruler, and time will begin anew!
Jeanne: Cereza! Wake up!
[She dips her hands into the electrified gel trying to reach the unconscious Bayonetta.]
Father Balder: Are you insane!? Light and Dark. Unless both eyes remain, the universe will lose its balance and face another armageddon!
[He tries to shoot a white ball into her back, but Jeanne still manages to get Bayonetta out.]
Jeanne: Then this thing should have slept for eternity! Now you must wake up, Cereza! Cereza! Cereza! Damn you! Open your eyes!
Bayonetta: Jeanne...?
Jeanne: Cereza, you aren't the person I sealed away 500 years ago. You have the strength to overcome this and fight. Finish this!
[Meanwhile, the transformation begins even without Bayonetta. A stream of energy carries Jeanne away from the statue.]
Father Balder: My, oh my… No one can control Jubeleus now. Its power is too intense… Light, dark, human. All the side, all the struggle… The Trinity of Realities wrapped up in a vortex of creation!
[The statue comes to life and turns into Jubileus. She creates a protective barrier around herself to prevent Bayonetta from escaping. Bayonetta prepares for battle.]
Bayonetta: Rest, my friend. I'm off to get that black cat.
[She defeats Jubileus and summons a giant Hindu goddess many tens of times larger than Jubileus. The goddess kisses her fist and hits Jubileus with such force that she flies into the atmosphere of the Earth and burns!!!]
[Bayonetta hangs in the air, giving her all her strength... The credits begin, but... Jeanne comes in and tramples them with her heel.]
Jeanne: Unbelievable. We managed to stop this abomination and it's still going to destroy the world!
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
[She once again survives by using her own motorcycle.]
Jeanne: Come now. You're one of a kind. If you die here, who is going to save the world? I’ll send you home, even if it kills me… Now let's finish this.
Bayonetta: You and I are going home together! Jeanne, we're both one of a kind!
Jeanne: Now those are the eyes I've been waiting to see.
[Together they destroy the statue falling to Earth.]
Bayonetta: Jeanne!
Jeanne: I'm OK!
Bayonetta: Let's go! Just stay close to me!
[They fall to Earth from space… Meanwhile, on Earth, the cult's adepts and Luka are watching what's happening in the sky.]
Luka: OK. This is getting ridiculous! How do you keep surviving all this!? I bet you're trying to sneak up on me right now… Aren't you, Bayonetta!?
[He turns sharply, but there is no one behind him. Next scene. The cemetery from the beginning of the game. A funeral is taking place.]
Enzo: Well, no rest for the wicked. But at least she's at peace, back in the box she came from. And I guess I'm gonna have to find a new racket to line my pockets. No bonus for Old Enzo this time. As fuckin' usial.
Rodin: You know how it works with witches, Enzo. They make a deal with the devil, and when they die, the devil gets his due. Ya get sucked down into hell, and wandering around scared shitless for eternity… kinda comes with the territory.
Enzo: Why you tellin’ me this!? Is this not why we are standing here, praying for her soul to rest in peace!? I better not be out here catchin' a fucking cold if these prayers don't mean nothing!
[Rodin grabs him and takes off his cigar.]
Rodin: It’s nice to think your prayers are worth a damn, isn't it? You made a killing exploiting her. Hell, you never know, she might get lonely and come back to haunt your ass!
Enzo: Haunt me! Hell can keep her then!
[Someone comes with two large bouquets of flowers, because of which the person himself is not visible. It’s Luka, as we soon learn.]
Luka: I said I’d never give up chasing you… I just never thought the chase end up like this. Rosemary. You said it was a demon repellent. It might help you on the road ahead…
[He kisses her goodbye and walks away. The nun smiles mischievously… Rays of bright light come from the sky and angelic singing can be heard.]
Enzo: Hey... Hey! Wait a second? What the hell are they coming down here to get her for!?
Nun?: Of course they'd come for the prize they've been seeking all along.
Luka: Holy shit! Your...
[The nun jumps through the portal and kills the three angels just like at the beginning of the game.]
Nun?: This looks ridiculous on me!
[She takes off her nun's robe and turns out to be Jeanne.]
Jeanne: I swear, this is the last time I cosplay.
[Jeanne battles the angels. Rodin knocks on the coffin.]
Rodin: You hear that!? That's your cue!
Jeanne: Will you hurry up!? Don’t tell me you fell asleep in that thing again!
Enzo: Hey! What the… You gotta fuckin' be kidding me… You tellin' me she's… Un-be-fucking-lievable!
[Bayonetta jumps out of the coffin.]
Bayonetta: Morning! What's with shoving me into this filthy old casket!? And next time, some air holes would be nice. Fewer worms, ideally...
Jeanne: Save the chit-chat for later. We've got work to do.
[They kill the angels and Luka realizes that he has fallen in love.]
Lika: Extra ingenue?
Bayonetta: It has a bit of rosemary. In the language of flowers, rosemary equates to remembrance… Suits me now, doesn’t it? Let's dance, boys!
[CREDITS]
[During the credits, we are shown the statistics of the playthrough, as well as give us a chance to fight for the last time.]
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